


Torn in Two

by BackStabber128



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Adventure, Aftermath, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Betrayal, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, Character Development, Ending Headcanons, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Manga Spoilers, Manipulation, Memory Alteration, Memory Loss, Parallels, Post 121, Post-Canon, Post-Timeskip, Survivor Guilt, Time Manipulation, dark themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-20
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2020-10-24 10:00:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20704112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BackStabber128/pseuds/BackStabber128
Summary: ...Once the wall titans break free from their prison, devestation and terror devours the world.In the midst of it all, Eren tells Armin one last thing he needed to do in order to end the war once and for all.One question is certain; How far are he and Mikasa willing to go?[Post 121]





	1. Shattered Glass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is pretty much my coping mechanism for the finale of AOT lol. So hopefully, you poor readers can suffer along with me.
> 
> So this is half a prediction, half character interaction, and 100% stuff I barfed out in order to avoid work for my classes^^
> 
> This is mainly Armin and Mikasa centric, since they're honestly my favorite duo so far.  
Their relationship is very underrated and I'm hoping they will rise to the spotlight in the end.  
(And also because it would be cruel to leave the other two main characters from the climax.)
> 
> Anyways, please enjoy.

_ Boom. _

The howl of yet another rifle round rang through the town. Followed by eruptions from a nearby explosion.

The once hypnotic, beaming blue sky was scarred with stains of yellow and ash browns. Streaks of smoke occasionally joined them. Marring the scenery into an ugly, puke-colored mess.

Fittingly, the air smelled of fresh smoke and putrid oil. Perhaps dashed with a pinch of gasoline.

More gunshots cracked, and pops of discarded bullets sprayed the battlefield. Chipping at the charcoal stained metal of the roof beside them.

Armin licked his lips, rasping in a determined breath. Fear was no longer present in his hardened, haunting, electric blue eyes. Ones who were once kind and childlike, only moments ago.

But now, his innocence had vanished.

Mikasa never imagined him looking comfortable carrying a rust-blotched sniper rifle in his normally gentle and soothing hands.

Yet, here he was --- reeled over the railing, finger squeezing the trigger with one battle-hardened eye screwed shut.

_ Boom. _

He fired once more.

More bullets rained upon them. More shouts and vicious slurs barked from across the scaffolding.

Everything else happened so fast. Armin had ordered, powerfully and confidently; "Advance." And soon, they were blasting through the air with their 3D maneuver gear.

Mikasa's dexterous, ivory fingers curled at the collar of her pale dress shirt. The action was unconscious, automatic. Searching for the discarded red fabric that had chained her neck for ten whole years. Then, she remembered Eren. And in an instant, her hand snapped away. As if the touch would disturb the scalding heat of a kitchen stove. 

A disgusted feeling ignited in her gut as memories of her old friend's cruel words invaded her mind. It was like he had struck her with a sword. Torn straight through her love and admiration for him like melted butter.

_ 'Maybe it was for a reason.' _ She told herself, despite her conflicting emotions. _ 'Maybe he was hurting us to protect us. Keeping us away from danger.' _

Could it be too good to be true?

Thoughts spun like weave in Mikasa's head. Reknitting that same pretty red scarf Eren had given her all those years ago. Thread by thread. String by string.

Yet still, his same blank expression remained. Devoid of anything that could be Eren. 

So instead, she focused on Armin. The way he soared through the air, his short blond hair whipping in the wind like rich, dark golden silk. Spry limbs spread in the sky like a hawk mid-flight.

Armin never changed. Never left her side, despite all the pain they went through. He was so kind, selfless, humble; all the things Eren wasn't during the time they needed him most. Mikasa knew Armin was someone she took for granted. He was someone she didn't deserve at a time like this.

She lost hope, and at some point, she thought Armin did, too. But now, it was clear he didn't.

Another gunshot in the distance crackled by, and Mikasa recalled the _ smack _of Eren's fist colliding with Armin's face. The thunderous booming meshed together, resembling when the two young men brawled further. Eren's cool green eyes were hollow, empty. His expression no more readable than a blank sheet of paper. As he pummeled Armin ruthlessly to the floor.

He seemed to treat it more like he were beating a ragdoll than his best friend.

She would never forget thel distress aching on the blond's swollen and bleeding face. Nor his deadweight in her arms while she guided him through the survey corps building and to the carriage doors.

…

After what seemed like ages, the gunshots finally came to a halt.

Fading away into the distance before being drowned out by the Armored Titan's shrieks. They were followed by a collision of rumbling noises.

Booming footsteps reverberating through the town that could only be caused by the…

_ 'Wall Titans…?' _

The horrifying thought intruded Armin's mind like wildfire.

But he couldn't let himself be distracted. Not now. 

The Cart Titan released a demented screech as it scaled up another building. Its jaws gnashed freakishly at the two soldiers, threatening to snap them in two if they came close.

Mikasa could see the titan's beady eyes shift behind her, then grow wide with shock.

That was the only falter the Ackermann needed. 

Bloodied blades slashed back and forth at the monster's face like a chopping guillotine. Red sprayed everything near. Painting the battlefield with bloody streaks of dark pomegranate. A blood-boiling battlecry erupted from Mikasa's lips, indirectly ordering Arlert to jump in for the finishing blow.

On cue, the blond sailed back, coiled muscles clenched at the ready. He mustered a triumphant grunt between his teeth, thrust a eager fist forward, and sent the explosives flying free.

Mikasa leapt back right as he activated the trigger. Steam and smoke erupted from where the titan once stood. Pieces of evaporating flesh bounced and scattered along the rooftops. And just like that, the enemy was ripped from her confines.

The Marleyan woman had strips of oil-black hair and pale ivory skin - much like Mikasa's, paired with rich brown eyes.

They were drained, tired, yet also scornful and intimidating. Training on Armin and Mikasa as if they were two children who had tracked mud in her house during a rainy night.

She said nothing, however, as if accepting her fate with open arms. 

Or, the open arms that she had two seconds prior. Since Mikasa had already torn the woman's limbs away with the swiftness of a nightingale.

All of the bombarding chaos in the background seemed to fall quiet. Until finally, relieved silence hung in the air. 

It was something none of the Survey Corps had fully experienced for nearly a year. For Armin and Mikasa, it was a miracle in and of itself.

Finding that he and his friend were no longer in immediate danger, Armin gazed up North, where the recurring _ rumble _ continued to thrum. 

Instantly, his stomach dropped to the floor.

Lined up along the buildings, like ants scattering from a flooded anthill, were mindless titans.

Hundreds of them. All scrabbling and slobbering over the fleeing Marleyan soldiers. Their faces twisted with grotesque grins. None of them were even vaguely recognizable. Not even as images of who they used to be flickered through Armin's wavering mind. 

Mikasa seemed to notice, too, without visibly batting an eye. The speck of a crease between her brows said everything;

That they, Connie, Eren, and Jean were the last of Paradis on the battlefield.

"We need to find Eren." Armin told her, fear straining the urgency in his voice. His eyes were unfaltering, nearly piercing as adrenaline hammered through his frame.

Mikasa nodded, a small, "Yeah." finally breaking the suspenseful silence between them. 

"Do you think you can shift over the wall? Or at least keep her from regenerating while we look for Eren?" She suggested.

They both noticed the subdued enemy's eyes flicker anxiously at the mention. 

"We can't afford extra weight." Armin replied, "It's too much of a risk out in the open like this, even with all the Marleyans distracted." 

Mikasa set a hand to her head, ignoring the next unwavering _ 'pow' _in the background. "I know." She said, hesitating, "I'll try to carry her, then. We can think it through while we look for---"

_ BLAM. _

The roof capsized, everything collapsed. The once sturdy metallic boards snapped and crumbled all at once. A shrill, awful, ripping noise pierced each of the soldiers' ears. The sound of river water trickling and smoothing over pebbles came next.

But the scent was of iron. Rich and heavy.

One that they were far too used to by now.

The overpowering gorge of smoke spewed into Armin's nose. Clogging up his windpipes like a dam halting a rushing river. Relentless and suffocating.

His chest felt like it was boiling. He tried to breathe, tried to breathe again -- but couldn't. Terror rushed to his head, activating his throbbing senses.

Armin's eyes burst open. He tried to gasp in a desperate gulp of air, only to choke, sputter, struggle to breath again, and repeat. Twice, three times. Black pulsed bright behind his eyes. Fire danced in reality. As his hands scrambled for purchase and for the trigger of his 3DM gear.

Seconds hammered by like the relentless pounding of his heart. Clumsy yet deft fingers fought against time. Ticking by like a clock timing the last seconds of life he had left. 

Finding the device at what felt like the last milli-second, he remembered what he had been trained. He aimed up at the sky and fired.

The cool, swift, rancid air hit Armin's face like a truck. Gratefully, he accepted it. _ 'Breathe… Breathe.' _The young man told himself. His throat felt raw, like he had been caught on a noose. Or maybe strangled from the grasp of his sins.

But there was also an odd warmth on his brow and splattered along his jawline. Resting on his elbows, he brushed his face experimentally. He frowned as his fingers came away coated with a fine crimson. His blood? Armin pondered, confused on how there was no lingering ache.

It didn't matter. He could heal. His faded eyes wandered as he lolled his head to the left. Now, he only needed to find… 

His mouth fell open mid-thought.

Armin expected himself to scream. A gasp, or at least a squeal of realization. But instead, he only uttered a faint, strangled breath. No crazed, animalistic shriek followed.

Just blank, hollow grey eyes and a chalk-white face. 

Only, they weren't his.

Rather, the barely recognizable bloody corpse splayed out beside him. His brain almost couldn't register who it was. _ 'Maybe the Marleyan?' _ He tried to convince himself, his teeth clenching and grinding with growing despair. _ 'But weren't her eyes brown?' _His stomach twisted tight at the realization.

Armin forced himself to look away, only to meet the gaze of the limbless woman he expected to find. And also, the harsh, murky green eyes of the girl who reminded him so much of Eren.

Her rifle trained directly on him, and their eyes locked. Her expression grew more uncertain and conflicted the longer she stared.

Armin could tell this wasn't what she wanted. He could tell by her wavering poise. She knew that they weren't devils, but people, just like her. But regardless, still a threat.

Gabi looked no more than a tired child at that moment. Not nearly like the bloodthirsty soldier she was supposed to be. Armin could only guess that he did, too.

That might explain why the girl had hesitated for so long.

Perhaps it was pity. Shame, that she had caused the death of the woman who had saved her weeks prior. 

All Armin had to do was succumb to his rage, chomp into his knuckle and they would all be dead. The whole town would be in ashes. Gabi seemed to know that as well. 

Fingers quivering, the gun barrel drooped ever so slightly. Her eyes lingered on the young man, intent to catch a reaction.

Armin could already see the glint of a silver sword behind the girl's head. Mikasa's sword. The thought made his blood boil. He almost flinched, but didn't let anger get to his head. _ 'They need to take me alive.' _ The blond realized, _ 'They need--'_

** _\---_ **

_ Mikasa set a hand to her head, ignoring the next unwavering 'pow' in the background. "I know." She said, hesitating, "I'll try to carry her, then. We can think it through while we look for---" _

An unknown force shoved Armin forwards. It might've been gravity, or his own damned reflexes for all he knew. 

He couldn't think about it for more than an instant, however, because another force sent him surging forward with the speed of a slingshot. Then, he saw it. A bomb. The exact instant before it made contact with the roof. With Mikasa.

Armin had no time to react. Right as he slammed into Mikasa, as he tackled her off the roof, bright peach and black flooded his vision. And almost immediately after, the odd combination of both numbness and excruciating pain.

The two soldiers clattered into gravel, their armor almost breaking on impact. Armin could see nothing. Nor could he feel the right side of his head. Reluctantly, he tried to blink, only to flinch as his body spasmed at the action. He could sense Mikasa's thick, wavering breaths beside him. Her chest rising and falling and his limp arm still looped around her neck.

Mikasa sat up, carefully guiding his limb back to the rocky ground. Her pale face was flushed tangerine by the bonfire soaring over the building they once stood. Like the brilliant afternoon sun glazing her cheeks on a hot summer day.

Mikasa’s voice began to stammer with disbelief, "Armin, what the hell were you thinking? That woman-- she could be dead, or she could come back if we…"

She slowly trailed off as the noticed blood spilling from her friend's face. It leaked down his forehead, staining the cloth of her off-white dress shirt.

A disturbingly large gash ripped across his scalp. Searing along his brow and left eye with veiny scribbles of scarlet. Steam already began spilling from the wound, healing it over. Causing bits of shrapnel to slip out automatically.

Despite his ragged breathing, Armin seemed to read his friend's expression, "I-I'll be fine." He reassured her. He attempted to stand uncertainly, only for his knees to wobble and stumble back to the floor.

Mikasa tried not to shudder at the sight of further injury beneath strands of stained gold - even a bit of bloodied skull that resembled a cracked vase caught her eye. The female drove her gaze away and winced. "The woman's still alive." Armin rasped through his teeth, "The girl Niccolo attacked threw the bomb at us in order to save her." It was clear the blond was sputtering too much information at once for his current state.

Perplexed, Mikasa hesitated. Recalling how his attention was fixed solely on her when she previously spoke. "How… how do you know?"

"I…" Armin pondered a bit, trying to put his scrambled thoughts into words. Inevitably, his eyes gradually lost their spark and fell to the floor, "...I don't know.”

Mikasa briefly remarked the odd response, before deciding Armin’s severe concussion was talking. She scooped the male’s hand in hers and guided him back to his feet.

"C'mon," She said, 

"We can still catch Eren before it's too late."

…

Debris fell from the sky, pummeling the streets like a crippling hailstorm. 

Mikasa leapt over hurdles of rubble and destruction, with Armin following close behind. They could hear the sounds of combat rapidly approaching. The sight of retreating Marleyan soldiers eventually began to recede, along with the gurgle and boom of nearby mindless titans.

Mikasa's eyes were sharp for any subtle movements or sounds. Her expression was tight with concentration and her limbs acted on pure instinct; whether it be from her heritage or not. Armin soon caught up with her, a similar emotion clear on his face. Though it was noticeably paranoid, and marred with dissolving purple welts.

He pointed to a building a few yards ahead of them. Mutely noting that it was sturdy enough to remain standing amongst the destruction.

Understanding, Mikasa nodded. It would be risky, but worth it, considering the consequences of wandering outside. 

Lithe as an elk, Armin launched himself through a broken window, with Mikasa quickly following suit. 

Miraculously, the place was empty. Or, at least, it seemed to be. Photos decorated the pale, auburn-encrusted walls. The silence was almost overbearing. The only sounds being the clicking of Armin and Mikasa's boots as they delved deeper.

They didn't utter a word, mindful of any stray enemies lingering nearby. All until they spotted sunlight beaming from a stylized window ahead. It stood out starkly from the harsh darkness of the rest of the building.

Cautiously, Armin let out a breath and stepped closer. The blond squinted, before his eyes grew wide, "Look…" He stuttered, pointing outside.

Between the wilted wooden boards, Mikasa could see it. Eren was standing two meters away from his older brother, Zeke. The former’s left hand was in his pocket, while the other floated far too close to his lips for comfort. It was clear what he was threatening to do.

The two were shouting back and forth at one another. Zeke looked desperate, distraught, terrified -- while Eren, in contrast, appeared far too calm for the circumstances.

The supposed ‘confrontation’ didn't last long. All it took was the crack of orange lightning, and the two reverted to their titan forms. Yet another battle began, however, it ended just as fast as it started.

Out of nowhere, a sharp, deadly blue crystal blade emerged from the earth. It skewered straight through the Beast Titan's hairy limbs and broad chest like nothing. And no matter how much Zeke thrashed and struggled, he was locked in place.

The Attack Titan tugged its previous comrade by the fur of its neck, so they could meet eye to eye. What happened next was something no one expected.

"I know…" Zeke's titan snarled, "I know there's only one way to stop you. But I'm sure by now that it's what you wanted all along…"

The Beast Titan forced a taunting smile. "Surely, it's not the death of Eldians you'd want. Right, Jaeger? You want to end everyone else's lives, not those of your friends. But I'm afraid you've forgotten - you have no control. I'm sure by now, you've realized who does. So if that power is what it takes to stop you, and put all Eldians to rest -- then so be it."

Zeke noticed that Eren said nothing, did nothing, as if not phased at all by his brother's outburst. Zeke knew he could be falling for yet another damned trick, but he didn't care anymore. All he wanted was for his people's suffering to end.

The Beast Titan's ink-black eyes blasted a brilliant golden yellow. It felt like he returned to the Paths dimension momentarily. Ordering Ymir three simple, yet powerful words that would change the world forever.

She obeyed. And this time, Eren didn't interfere.

The darkness of Paths wisped away like it was only a dream. Back in reality, the Attack Titan snatched Zeke's throat.. He peered into the latter's eyes. Snatching away his thoughts one by one. Piecing the shards together until they formed a pattern he could understand.

It lasted only a few moments. And by the time Zeke realized what his brother was doing, he had already lost control.

The raw, indescribable power seeped from his grasp. Drained from his veins. Zeke's eyes bugged in horror. He could almost hear Eren's mocking voice replaying in his head. 

_ "The Attack Titan doesn't follow orders." _

Eren wouldn't be able to handle it. It would be too much for a non-royal, wouldn't it?

Eren's titan bared its teeth, brows screwed into a tight line. The surge of power flooded his mind like a drug, obscuring all other thoughts he had.

_ 'This is what you've been preparing for.' _ He reminded himself dutifully. _ 'Save your people.' _

With one last heart-piercing _ 'crunch,' _yet another crystal blade tore through the Beast Titan's nape. An expression of grief swept across Zeke's face. But faded as the Attack Titan's brutish fingers curled around his torso. "_Is he… helping me…?' _Zeke pondered, confused. He quickly became mortified.

"No…" He yelped, as the monster's jaw gaped open, exposing a full set of yellow, razor-sharp teeth. "No!" Zeke suddenly screeched, writhing and fighting for his life. His hollers and struggles ended right as he was caught between the titan's teeth. The jaws snapped shut within an instant, and blood showered the rooftops.

"He's insane…" 

Mikasa spoke under her breath, watching as her husk of a friend devoured his older brother with no remorse. 

Not knowing what else to do, she spun to face Armin, "What do we do?" Her voice was breaking, panicking. Something the blond had never heard before. "We need to do something, anything, we can't just stand here. Can't just let him destroy everything -- kill everyone."

"I know." Armin replied calmly, despite the terror clear on his face.

Mikasa blinked away the angry tears in her eyes, "What has he become?" She paused, "Tell me, Armin, have you figured it out yet? Anything at all? Anything that would give the slightest damn clue to why Eren's doing all of this?"

Armin opened his mouth hesitantly, before closing it again. His thick brows were furrowed in concern, contemplative.

"I have an idea, but I still can't be sure." He claimed, "We can only judge Eren by his actions. If he just betrayed Zeke, that means he lied to Yelena about his plan. Just like I thought."

"Does that mean… he's on our side?" Mikasa tested, "If he doesn't want to make us infertile, what does he want? Would he rather kill us all?" 

The missing pieces began to set into place in Armin's mind. He remembered the ocean again. Recalled Eren's genocidal words. Then later, when he unfurled words from the past. The look of distress after he made contact with Historia at the ceremony. How empty, passive, and calm Eren appeared every time they saw him afterwards. Almost like… he had seen it all before. Rewatched a stage play. Replayed a musical.

Could it be possible that…

Armin's frantic, electrified eyes met Mikasa. He was about to tell her, explain everything. Regardless of how insane he would sound.

But the distant crumbling and rupture of stone caught him off guard. Followed by disastrous, booming thunder that reverberated through the buildings walls.

Both Armin and Mikasa knew that it was much more than a thunderstorm.

Without warning, Mikasa grabbed Armin's wrist with a strength that was somehow greater than what she normally had. And in that instant, the blond wondered if it was fear that drove her to be as strong as she was. The fear of losing the last person she trusted. The last person she loved.

A massive meaty foot obliterated the set of buildings behind them, including the one they had just escaped. Sending shards of wood and metal soaring through the air.

Armin had forgotten how close to the wall they were. With each terrified pump of adrenaline, the world looked more like a blur than a city. Or maybe that was all the scalding steam and smoke emerging from what was once the walls.

Rocks spilled like pebbles dripping from god's hands. Avalanching like the snow Armin read about in that book that once captured his imagination. Now, it was more like reliving his own nightmare.

He could see them, the monsters, Colossal Titans. They were everywhere, surrounding them. They looked so much like his own, only more disfigured, confused and inhuman. They were once people, it only made sense.

Mikasa hadn't said anything. She was still clutching Armin's hand tight in her own. Without even realizing it, he squeezed back.

They didn't know what to do. There were so many titans. 3DM gear might as well have been a death sentence. Connie and Jean were nowhere to be seen. And the once cool, refreshing air was quickly becoming scorching and unbearable.

But they needed to do _ something. _

Armin swore through his teeth and gripped Mikasa's slender hand again. "C'mon." He urged through the mind-numbing hissing of steam. "We need to move. Follow me."

Mikasa nodded, but failed to hide how her breath quivered with fear. She knew it was crazy, she knew it could lead to their deaths, but there was nothing else they could do.

With a flick of their wrists, the two were back sailing through the air. Somehow, speed only made the heat even more burning, but they had no time to waste worrying about it.

It gave Armin a horrifying sense of deja vu. Vague memories that he would rather leave trapped in the depths of his mind.

Mikasa couldn't see anything through the sizzling fog that surrounded them. It smeared the sky into a murky greenish brown. The buildings became blots of dark orange splattered along the pale horizon. 

Armin's eyes danced across the terrain. Tracking along rooftops. Searching desperately for the friend they oathed to protect -- regardless of everything he had done. 

A snapping noise sounded everytime Armin activated his 3DM gear. The wire wound around a chimney, pierced a support beam, before stabbing through the leg of a titan. He whirled around in the air, trying to hear past the howling winds.

Mikasa was still behind him, but he couldn't look back. The male clicked at his device again, fingers working on reflex.

Left, right, left, right, right, left---

Armin swore between breaths. Meaningless hissing that was nothing compared to what was bombarding his eardrums. But soon, the booming began to fade away.

And there, a faint, humanoid silhouette caught his eye.

It had long, charcoal brown hair and tired blue-green eyes, all obscured by dust. The body was stretched out on the tiles of a roof. His hands were tucked behind his head, as if he were stargazing, relaxing -- even in the midst of a nightmare he had caused.

Armin involuntarily gasped. Tears nearly trickled down his face in relief, contrasting with the uncertainty still bubbling in his gut. The stomping and rasping was approaching rapidly. Armin knew he only had one last chance to prove himself.

"Eren!!"

He cried, his 3DM gear slammed into the wood next to the brunette.

Armin landed beside his friend with a _ thud. _ It was only then that he realized he had lost Mikasa. He had lost the one who needed him most because of…

Face twisting into a mix of fury and despair. He squeezed his eyes shut, unwilling to meet the gaze of the man who caused his pain.

"Why…" He began, his voice thick and cracking, "Why did you do this?" 

There was no time for confrontation or questioning, but there was so much emotion swelling that Armin couldn't help it.

Eren shifted in his position, staring idly past his childhood friend and into the bleary grey sky. 

"I know you've already figured it out." He stated bluntly, "You always have. You just don't want to accept it."

Armin fell silent at that, the cold truth hitting him like a blaze of flame. 

"...Is it worth it?" He tried. His eyes fell on the dozens of Colossals waltzing towards them in the distance. "All those innocent people… You're just going to kill them all? Is that the only way? Do you think this will make them fear us any less?"

Eren leaned back again and shut his eyes. "No." He said, "But it will end the war between us." Fluttering open his eyes, the taller male stood back to his feet.

Dull, eerie silence took over them. Without the distant pound of thunder, it would've been deadly silent. Suspenseful.

"It had to be done." Eren continued, "Just like what we have to do next." 

Armin could only watch as the brunette plucked a knife from his pocket and observed it closely. "The titans are going to drive through here and all the remaining Marleyans will witness their power. Whether they die or not, it doesn't matter."

Eren glanced into the horizon again, before walking past the shorter male. 

"You know what to do." He stated, although it sounded more like a remark. "Mikasa will find you after you're done. And, I promise, before this is all over, we will meet again. Although, it might not be how you'd expect.

"Was it a lie…?" The words left Armin's lips in a murmur, "What you said to us that day... was it all true?"

Turning back to his long lost friend once more, Eren offered a smile. It fell fast, however, appearing forced and strained.

"Anything can be the truth if you believe it is." 

With that, he vanished. As if he were never there. 

Speechless, Armin's eyes trailed down to his feet, where the haunting gleam of a knife appeared. The sharp blade reflected the dull green sky like a mirror. Warping into a reality of death and temptation. The world he lived. 

It became clear what Eren wanted.

Perhaps a world that contrasted the one reflected on the knife. One with peace and harmony between Eldians and Marleyans. 

Maybe that was what Eren wanted. Just to intimidate them into surrendering. No one had to die.

That was the world Armin strived for. That's why Eren came to him, wasn't it?

Armin was so busy thinking that he hardly processed the agonized screaming of soldiers behind him. Nor the disoriented groans of Colossals who slowly stomped their way past him.

_Wasn't it?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think, and don't be afraid to ask questions in the comments. I love and cherish every single one. If you want me to continue, let me know, cause I'd love to.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading.


	2. Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mikasa asks Armin about something he should have told her a long time ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to split this chapter into two parts so this could hit Arumika week~~
> 
> This is, of course, set in the future of the previous chapter. The specific time that passed is completely up to your interpretation.
> 
> Alot of this is just my ending headcanons yet again, so don't be surprised if a "certain topic" mentioned is a bit far fetched, because I have no idea what AOT lore is half the time.^^
> 
> Anyways, please enjoy.

Armin took a long, careful sip of the deep auburn liquid that filled his glass. Sunlight churned its color into a creamy butter honey, reflecting the rich, sweet, earthy taste that lingered on his tongue. 

Gratefully, the male leaned back in his seat, savouring the teas perfect taste. Armin stared at the blank paper his pen hovered over, brows knit into a fine line.

Messy flaxen bangs framed his blue eyes and shadowed over the faint bags underneath. His utensil waddled mindlessly, nearly whacking the tip of his stubby nose each time.

Back and forth, back and forth, it fluttered.

Mikasa watched her friend cautiously from the doorway. She shifted on her feet, unsure how to broach the subject she intended to mere minutes prior. It was something that had haunted her for months on end. Something she couldn't bring herself to face until now. 

Moments passed. And soon, she found that the longer she stood there, the more she became captivated by Armin's daydreaming eyes. Sensed the gears cranking in his head. Caught the _ click _ of an idea reflecting on his face, as his wrist flexed, but the pen kept dangling. Until the spark slipped away.

Mikasa fiddled with her silver robes, once again second-thinking her actions. Maybe she could wait until later, or maybe nightfall, perhaps. She didn't want to resurface any bad memories, nothing that would upset either of them further or make them regret talking in the first place. Armin would understand, she knew, he always did. No matter the circumstances. She just hoped that--

"Your tea's really good, Mikasa."

The female froze, and gawked back at Armin, who had peeked his head up from the book. Looking back at her with a soft smile. God, how long had it been since he _ smiled? _

"Oh... uh, thanks." Was all Mikasa could think to say. She reluctantly slid from the doorway, watching idly as Armin flipped back another page.

"I... I guess it reminds me of what my mom used to make." He added, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. "It was a long time ago, but I still remember it."

Mikasa's lips curved at the mention. "Yeah, I know what you mean." She said. Her own fond family memories slowly returned to her. But inevitably, they seeped away, replaced by the cold inquiry that had begged to break free all morning.

"It... it feels like..." Mikasa began hesitantly. Unconsciously, she stroked a string of charcoal hair from her cheek, "It's been so long since," She paused again, gazing as Armin's face softened in understanding.

"I know." He spoke. Whether he was talking about Eren or his parents' death was unclear.

"I've been...uh, writing a book about it." He continued, sorrow shifting the calmness of his voice. The voice that had only just begun to crack and deepen - ever so slightly - despite the years that hung over him. Mikasa almost wondered if the titan curse had something to do with it.

"That's what this is," Armin tapped a knuckle on the book in his lap, "I've been doing it for awhile, I mean, jotting notes through our battles. Just in case we forgot anything."

Mikasa nodded, another small smile finding its way to her lips, "Smart." She commented, "It… er, must be a pretty tragic story though."

Armin took another generous swig of the tea - as if he were cheering with a rich, satisfying slurp of alcohol - before sighing, clanking the glass back down. 

"It sure is."

Mikasa took notice of the empty sheets of paper he had been staring at, and rose a brow. "What part are you stuck on?"

The young man frowned at her words. But after an offhand clear of his throat, he decided to answer. "Eren’s fate." He said bluntly. His hands folded themselves on his lap automatically, "I guess... I guess I just wish it could end differently. That maybe, if he lived, he could bring everyone back to life, they would all live happily and..." He caught Mikasa's somber gaze from the corner of his eye, and his voice fell, "...I don't know."

"But that wouldn't be a good story, would it?" Mikasa offered a kind gesture. "The best stories are the ones that make you grateful for your own life. Teaches you how to make better decisions and helps you see the world through different perspectives..." The woman trailed off, suddenly realizing what it meant for her in reality. 

She fell quiet, and weight seemed to sink on her. Crushing her throat with the strange combination of eager fascination and stomach-dwelling shame. She recalled why she was there in the first place, and willing up her voice, she decided it was now or never.

"I wanted to speak to you about Eren."

Mikasa's eyes tracked Armin's features again, noting the stern eye contact and repetitive tap of his finger on his jeans. He seemed to understand the urgency of her question.

"Can..." She hesitated, "Can you... tell me what happened? The last time you saw him? I wish I could've been there with you, or at least said goodbye... one last time."

Armin licked his lips and squeezed his hands together - a nervous habit. His bleary blue eyes suddenly seemed more preoccupied with the glass of tea rather than his friend.

Mikasa knew the mention of the topic shook him, resurfaced a memory that he preferred to leave sunk in a sea of thoughts. A mind full of imagination. One that didn't deserve the dread of keeping such a dark secret. One that not even Mikasa had known.

"I knew I'd have to tell you eventually." Armin confessed bleakly, sighing.

"Eren told me…" His face twinged with a mix of guilt and regret, "...to transform and meet him at the plaza where the remaining Marleyans were hiding. To fight him, let them watch, and report it to the rest of the world - just in case there were any survivors. They said that the threat had been eliminated by an unlikely hero; ‘an Eldian with the power of the God of Destruction.’ I guess Eren thought mercy wasn't good enough for them, so he killed them all with the wall titans… shortly after…"

Armin fell quiet, taking one more lick from his tea glass. Mikasa could tell that he wasn't finished with his words. Could tell that he was hiding something, had _ been _hiding something. A secret under his tongue, behind his back, clothed in the husky black of his eyes - which were viced to the carpet floor.

Armin had lied, somewhere, somehow, or evaded something he knew would upset her. She had seen him do it before, skillful and deceptive. Sheathed the cloak of a facade, played a poor victim like a puppet. Used their weaknesses to his advantage, like many had done to him.

Judging by the flick of his pupils, Armin seemed to know it as well. That Mikasa could see straight through his disguise.

"Eren told me…" The blond began, his fists clenching anxiously, "That there was only one way to defeat him - to make everyone believe that he was truly gone."

Mikasa's heart dropped at his words, slowly realizing what Eren's plan had been all along. It had been said four years ago. Came full circle. With words neither of them wanted to accept.

"He said that he wanted to show me… what he's done, so… so he didn't have to, said he couldn't bring himself to kill me."

Mikasa could see the tears building, threatening to spill, but Armin shut his eyes before they could.

"You don't have to continue," Mikasa digressed, already regretting the result of her actions. Armin raised a hand to interrupt her.

"No, no, it's fine." He reassured, "You deserve to know. I should've told you once we were safe in the walls.”

Mikasa opened her mouth to object, but said nothing. Her gut twisted in both curiosity and despair of what he would say.

“I see now, what his plan was.” Armin noted, “All the things he’s done… He did it because he wanted us to be happy.” 

Mikasa remembered that horrible day, how she lost Armin in all the steam in their search for Eren. Heard vague specks of them talking through the wind and her hacking coughs.

“Every horrible thing he said…”

Finding Armin’s titan standing amongst debris. The shifting explosion seeming like nothing compared to the empty husk of destruction the town already was. 

“Was to keep us away…”

Mikasa ripped him from its nape, overlooking the blond’s blank face that slightly resembled Eren’s, yet sparked with horror and despair. Tears stained pink streaked past the bloody titan lines that decorated his cheekbones.

“...Protect us.”

Mikasa realized that she never saw him transform after that. But what was the point if there were no enemies to fight? No war to be won? 

One desperate decision would make it all make sense.

“Armin, no, no--you didn’t.” The female stammered, disbelieving. Why would Eren tell him to do such a thing? Bombard his once best friend with so much responsibility? Was it fear? Desperation? Spite?

“Eren said that it needed to be done.” Armin replied, swishing the last traces of golden tea in his glass. “He wanted me to use his power to end the titan curse. Bring all the titan shifters to one vessel.”

The young man crinkled his nose, bringing his hands to rest on the arms of his chair. All traces of tears seemed to dry at that moment. Accepting his fate, the curse of survival with open arms.

Mikasa was at a loss for words. Her friend's answer only opened the door to hundreds of more questions. Hundreds of possibilities. One question in particular stood out in her mind, causing her to snap out of her trance. “Why did you wait so long to tell me?”

‘I don’t know.” Armin admitted, “I was afraid. I didn’t know what to do, so I tried to forget about it. Act like it was all just a dream. Like a coward.”

"You're not a coward." Mikasa spoke up, vocal chords stern. Her statement seemed to do nothing but stir the male's emotions further.

"I saw what Eren did - while we were sitting there, trying to figure out what he was doing. The things he did were unimaginable. You wouldn't believe me if I told you. And the whole time he was fighting for freedom, we did nothing. I was too scared to do anything. Just like when I was a kid, just like---"

The raven haired woman grabbed his hand before he could finish. Smoothing slender fingers over rough knuckles. 

"Eren chose you for a reason." She stated, "You could've backed away. Said you couldn't do it and left him there to die to his own creations. But you didn't." She squeezed his hand gently, "And that's something I _ never _ could have done."

Her friend was taken aback by that. He always knew Mikasa was close to Eren - closer than he was - since childhood. But now, it didn't matter. The strength of their bond didn't matter. Eren was gone, whether they liked it or not. And now, they only had each other.

Armin gradually leaned into Mikasa's touch, suddenly appearing drained and exhausted, despite the caffeine her tea offered him. He clutched her fingers to his chest, sinking his head downwards and letting out a deep, nearly-relieved sigh. As if a bone crushing weight was lifted from him as well.

Vulnerability was something they were used to sharing with one another. It was something Mikasa never had with Eren, never had the chance.

She found herself smiling again, her cheeks aching with the craving of long lost happiness. It was something neither of them had experienced in what felt like forever.

She brushed the soft, golden fringe from Armin's eyes, discovering the faint, dark bags he attempted to hide from her. 

"Did you sleep last night?" She asked, quirking a dark brow. 

The male shook his head with a halfhearted huff, "Only a bit. I just didn't want to tell you… about the memories."

Mikasa nodded in understanding, mindlessly winding a lock of blond hair around her finger. "You can spend the night in my room again," She offered, "if you want."

A grateful smile flickered across Armin's face, "I would love to." He said.

Mikasa paused, curling another lock softly on her thumb. "And thank you. For telling me, and trusting me." 

Armin looked up at her, features glistening with both sincerity and maturity.

"No problem."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be out soon.
> 
> As always, don't forget to leave your thoughts and drabbles in the comments.^^


	3. Red Strings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After hearing news of Levi and Hange's miraculous recovery, Armin and Mikasa decide to see if the rumors were true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on chapter 122, this story diverts pretty significantly from the original lol. But of course, that's to be expected.  
Levi makes a small but impactful appearance in this chapter. Let me know what you think of him, cause I had alot of fun writing his blunt and sarcastic lines.  
Everything here leads up to the calamity that awaits in the fourth chapter. It may or may not be the last, but it definitely carries the "passing the torch" theme I wanted to convey for this story.
> 
> I hope you all are enjoying this so far, and don't hesitate to drop any feedback!

Armin and Mikasa could sense judgemental gazes from wandering eyes. Tracking their every move, every glance. Paranoid whispers and hisses occasionally grabbed their attention.

The soldier's black, formal dress shoes clacked across the stone floor with each step. Penetrating the silence of the mostly stripped and empty alleyway.

They matched the dark suit shirt Armin had forced himself in for the occasion. It was slightly oversized, the sleeves dangled past his wrists, and a simple black tie flapped loosely over his white under shirt. Which was uncharacteristically blotted with specks of oatmeal he had scarfed down during breakfast.

Mikasa wore similar attire; a light beige sweater under a gothic dress that ran down her figure like river water, and tucked into midnight grey pants. An auburn-dusted belt secured the cloth around her waist.

They made sure to dress appropriately for their destination. Just in case they ran into anything unexpected.

They overheard scattered rumors spilling from citizens' lips around them. Rumors about Eren, Zeke, and the 'saviors from the Survey Corps.' The controversy of the Rumbling, and how the world was still struggling to recover from such a traumatic event.

How they watched the wall titans march in a straight line, purging through the depths of the deepest oceans, emerging back on land, and obliterating everything and everyone who stood in their path.

How the world shook for days on end -- maybe weeks -- before it stopped. And that the lands beyond Shiganshina were like wastelands. No trace of life survived the calamity and no innocents were spared. The future Eren caused.

No one could be sure if the rumors were true, however, because no one was allowed to venture past the crumbs of rock that were once the walls.

Many of the military commanders disappeared without a trace, along with hundreds of soldiers who risked their lives for freedom.

There were only two commanders who were still breathing since the battle ended, last known in critical condition from their injuries. The news that they had survived was a miracle in and of itself. So much so, that Armin and Mikasa had to see it with their own eyes to believe it. Which was why they were exposing themselves outside in the first place.

Armin tucked his hands in his pockets nervously as the building they were looking for rapidly approached. Suspenseful silence hung over him and Mikasa as their feet clicked onto the doorstep.

Mikasa stepped towards the doors of the ragged outhouse, her face blank. The place was a pathetic excuse for a home, let alone a hospital. The windows were old and corroded with grime. The insides might as well have been a filthy, abandoned bar before its renewal.

Mikasa twisted the doorknob, swinging it open, and -- God, oh God, the _ smell _. 

It was a rotten, musty odor. It reminded her of the horse stocks, or the mound of rotting corn shucks behind the barn.

Judging by Armin's scrunched and disgusted expression, he thought so as well.

The two soldiers had just entered, and people were already rushing past them. Some with clipboards, hats, gowns -- but none even slightly resembled certified doctors.

Armin could tell that they were volunteers, if anything. Just normal people trying to help out with the cause.

Shifting past the dozens of workers, the two eventually worked up to the front desk. A pudgy, middle-aged woman was behind the counter. With fiery red hair streaked with grey and ears pierced with silver.

She shouted orders and jabbed a pen at multiple people across from her. Sweat beaded across her wrinkled forehead.

When the volunteers quickly scattered, Mikasa decided to intervene, "Excuse me, excuse me--We're looking for a patient here. His name is Ackermann, Levi Ackermann -- Do you know where he is?"

The older woman's beady eyes rolled down a paper she was holding. It took her a few moments before she scowled and shook her head. "I don't believe so, Ms. I'd recommend checkin' the death list again just to see if he ain't."

"We didn't see his name there, ma'am. That's why we came." Armin retorted, "What about Hange? Is there a Hange Zoe on your board?"

The redhead squinted her paper once more, skimming steadily down the list of alphabetical names. Her tongue unconsciously lapped at the lines of her rosey red lipstick.

"They're the last commanders we have." Armin continued, reasoning, "They've been missing for weeks, like everyone else. We only just heard that they survived and made it past surgery."

"Well, you're in luck, lad." The woman's finger fell on words at the end of the paper, "Zoe, H. -- Double room." She read, poking at the glasses slipping off her nose, "Room 26, first floor."

Armin and Mikasa's faces brightened up in unison. But soon, the realization of the crippling side effects of the commanders' injuries hit them, and their faces fell.

After rummaging and juking through more medical equipment and crowds, they found it. A small, craggy crevice, which looked more like a hole busted in the wall than a room.

The number '26' was painted on a wooden slate above it, and a lofty purple curtain fluttered in place of a door. Causing the mood to turn ominous as Armin prepared to peek inside.

The cloth felt like paper between his fingers as he pulled it apart. The first thing he saw past the blinding sunlight was a man sitting in a wheelchair. He sat in front of a window with his back facing them.

A small tea cup was lifted between three visibly quivering fingers, clutching the base in the oddest way that reminded him so much of--

"Captain..." Mikasa gasped, almost disbelieving her eyes. She raced over to his side, resisting the urge to pull him in a crushingly joyful embrace. Fearing that would only injure him further. "The news was true, you're alive!"

Levi turned his head to face her and Armin, looking more drained and uninterested than they had hoped.

The two soldiers flinched when they noticed his features up close. Painful scars marred the man's once unblemished ivory skin. Welts and bruises bloomed below his neckline and splattered along his forearms.

Bloodied casts and spiderwebs of bandages winded up his limbs, most likely obscuring any further damage underneath.

"In the flesh." Levi muttered half-heartfully, but the soldiers could still sense the relief that rinsed through his battered form.

"I'm a bit more disabled than I'd like, however." He scowled, gesturing to the wheelchair he sat in.

Armin cringed a bit behind his friend, recalling previous crippled soldiers who used them after retiring from the military. "How… how bad is it?" He asked.

Levi clicked his tongue, clearly expecting the question, "Can't walk, can't fight, can't run, can't feel my legs, can't see from my right eye--" He breathed, rubbing at an agitated spot between his eyebrows. "At least, on the bright side, me and Hange get to wear matching eyepatches."

His tone was so sarcastic, it was comical.

Mikasa glanced over at the giant snoring lump on the mattress at the corner of the room.

"How is she?" She inquired. Levi took a calm sip of warm tea before responding, "Pretty fine. I stole some painkillers for her a few hours ago because she asked."

Armin's eyebrows rose, "In a wheelchair?" 

Levi merely looked back at the male blankly, scratching his jaw, "I improvised."

"It's only fair, anyways, since she practically saved my life." He added, "Even though, fuck, lets face it, death would be a mercy at this point. More for me than you, I guess. But it's good to see that someone in my squad survived other than me for a change."

Armin felt like he should have been happy, or at least relieved that he had been one of the few survivors in the military. But instead, he felt guilt and sorrow. And a sick feeling that engulfed his gut like an inferno. Like bile threatening to rise in a fit of nausea. 

Every death counted on his fingers only made the feeling worse. He hated it.

"That idiot really fucked up everything, didn't he?" Levi reprised, shaking his head. He stared out the window with a look lethal enough to kill. The sight of rubble and obliterated buildings were in plain sight. 

"I almost wish he was here so I could beat his ass again, even if I wasn't physically capable."

“That’s… also what we wanted to tell you about.” Mikasa hesitantly unraveled. Her eyes locked with Armin’s, both of them felt the dread the words unraveled. It throbbed along with their heartbeats.

“I’m not surprised.” Levi noted, narrowing blank eyes. "I’ve heard the stories. People can’t stop talking about you two. I’ve seen it in newspapers all over town. Hell, some people are already convinced that it was a ‘prophecy foretold’ and plan to build a whole damned religion around it."

“That’s not all we wanted to say, sir.” Armin spoke, “We haven’t told anyone else about it, but there's been odd… side effects recently…” 

The blond shivered at the scenes flickering through his mind. They were memories, of course. But bold, and consisted mostly of four people -- most he recognized. Reiner, Annie, the black haired Marleyan woman he and Mikasa had seen, and a young, blond hazel-eyed boy.

Titan shifters. The only humans who had a chance of surviving the rumbling, which only further added up to Eren’s horrifying advice. 

That deep phantom-like expression, the last second Armin saw him. 

Eren's face twisted in dutiful agony. He knew he was hurting him, ripping out a part of Armin that could never be replaced. 

Eren looked terrified---no, more than that, worse than that---his disguise shriveled away like a snake shedding its skin, extinguished like an ocean halting a furiocious bout of fire. He was visibly petrified, for the first time in four years.

The brunette’s flesh seemed to sear off by the heat of the Colossal Titan. He was lifted by the scalding, meaty fist that was squeezing his torso.

But it was clear that Eren didn’t care. He had made his and Armin's reencounter look like a battle to everyone watching. The Attack Titan had slashed and clawed futilely at the Colossal’s feet and legs with no avail.

Armin tore his friend out of the nape of his fleshy prison and held him so they were face to face. They had to make it look real, but Armin wanted to make it quick. He didn’t want his friend to suffer more than he already had.

“Premonitions?” 

Levi remarked back in reality, “Like the ones Eren had? The ones that drove him bat-shit insane?” 

Mikasa rubbed Armin’s shoulder, seemingly already knowing the conflicting thoughts that were rushing through his mind. 

“He wants me to go outside the walls, in specific places.” The blond recalled miserably, “To… kill the remaining titan shifters. But, I don’t know if--I don't know how we could…"

Levi clinked his tea cup on a small wooden table beside him, “...Well, I don’t know why you’re asking me what to do. Eren trusted you with his bullshit, so it’s up to you to decide how to deal with it.” He remarked bluntly.

“So you--you’re giving us permission to go outside?” Mikasa tested, "Outside the walls?"

“If you have a deathwish, then yes." Levi almost chuckled. "The survey corps is practically disbanding as we speak, brats. I doubt anyone would care if a few kids decide to take a vacation for a bit. Mainly, because there are no commanders to prosecute you, other than me and Hange,”

He paused, eyeing the two senior-recruits coldly, before adding, “In other words, yes, you have my permission.”

The two soldiers automatically saluted in unison, “Thank you, sir.” Armin said, in both shock and relief.

"Don't mention it. Also, there's a boat on the far side of the docks. If it's still intact, you can take it. I doubt anyone's going to use it anytime soon."

Levi peered back outside for a few moments, tapping an injured nub of a finger on the windowsill, "Just don't tell anyone I told you, got it?"

Armin nodded vigorously, both he and Mikasa found the news too good to be true. "Thank you, sir." He repeated, grateful as ever.

“We’ll return whenever you're able to recover.” Mikasa added.

“_If _I recover.” Levi scoffed, spinning back to face the window.

"Safe travels."

###

They slowly scaled the broken crags and mounds of the walls. 

It was easy to slip on rubble, but they were military trained, and they had long since passed the danger and warning signs fifty feet below. 

Once their heads finally emerged over the last blade-sharp cliff of rock, they saw it. 

Rifts of countless massive footprints became clear in the horizon. The way the sunlight couldn’t reach the ridge of the craters, and how the imprints intersected with multiple others. Most trees were left untouched, except the ones that were flattened and crushed into piles of twigs. Stamped into the Earth’s crust.

Patches of grass were still abundant among the terrain, painting the scenery into an odd blend of nutritious green and murky brown. 

All Mikasa and Armin could do was give a moment to stare in horror at it all before venturing further into the supposed ‘wastelands.’

The world Eren created.

Their 3DM gear cracked and snapped as the two thrusted through the air. They remembered the scorching heat of steam far too clearly, as well as the heart-pumping adrenaline flooding their heads.

But they tried to ignore it and focus on the beautiful, blissful breeze that blew their hair away from their eyes. Exposing the two’s contrasting colors of blue and grey. Black and blonde.

It wasn’t long before their hooks punctured the stone walls of an all too familiar barricade. They scaled and conquered the last obstacle, and afterwards, their boots sunk into soft, powdery white sand. 

The spell-bounding scent of saltwater filled Armin’s nose. Blinding him with luscious memories that were once long forgotten. 

It sent joyous nostalgia trickling down his spine, yet also sadness and sorrow of what they had lost.

Before he knew it, he was standing in grey, soggy mush and the ocean waves were crashing at his feet. Soaking into the calves of his pants.

In front of him, was what he and Mikasa were looking for -- a small fishing boat with a tall, wooden shaft and sturdy brown boards. It bobbed up and down with each slap of water against its base. 

A large, algae-covered rope tied to the docks was the only thing keeping it from drifting away, and into the gorgeous pink, purple and orange sunrise.

_ 'How can the world be so beautiful yet so broken at the same time?' _He couldn't help but wonder.

Mikasa was standing next to him, he realized. Eyeing him cautiously. Searching for any visible uncertainty as he admired the view. It was the same expression she had when she told him that she was coming with him to Marley. Telling him that she didn’t want him to go alone. Didn't want him to die.

It felt like she was talking to Eren when she said that. Made him feel strange, different. A flitter in his stomach, like the flutter of Mikasa’s eyelashes when she blinked -- waiting patiently for an answer. 

Armin looked back at her, like he did that day, the day the sun peaked high in the sky, rode their horses up the hill and dipped their feet into the sweet, crystal-blue water for the first time. He cherished that moment, the weightlessness of it, the peace, feeling like he was free, even if he wasn’t.

Little did he know, Mikasa did, too. It was only then, two yards away from the boat meant to sail them to Marley, three inches away from the ocean, and four years later, did he realize.

But he didn’t say a word.

“Are you ready?” Mikasa asked him, her voice steady and determined as ever. 

Armin nodded, his eyes barely faltering as their eyes met. “Yes.” He didn't realize how confident his own voice became.

Without another word, they boarded the ship together. Mikasa checked the deck for the food, water, and supplies they were promised, before she and Armin slipped off their survey corps uniforms and shucked two matching beige and black shirts over their heads. Simple black slacks and grey pants soon followed.

It was a precaution for when they appeared in front of the lingering survivors. So they wouldn't recognize them as Paradis Eldians. Not until they needed to.

With a flick of a blade, the ropes that restrained the boat were sliced like slick butter. Then, the soldiers joint effort to unleash the sails. They worked their backs, pushing forward with their legs and shoulders. Winding the crank around and around.

Armin was so lost in his efforts that he barely felt his conch slipping from his front pocket. He only heard the audible '_ cle-dunk', _before he snapped his eyes open, and saw its crown sink deep into the ocean.

Acting fast, Armin yelped and leapt into the water, sending a mighty splash Mikasa's way. He didn't hear her call out his name. Nor did he see her lean over the ships ledge.

The salt burned his eyes and scorched up his nose like wildfire. He could see nothing through the blurry haze of darkness. Drenching miles below the water's surface like an empty abyss. 

Only a small section of a sandbar was reachable, and before he knew it, his hands were already scrabbling through the discolored muck. 

It was soft, so soft, spongy almost, and it slipped through his fingers. He struck something, it was solid, sharp--but solid. It had to be it, he decided.

Armin's ears popped painfully as he resurfaced. He was soaked from head to toe, his eyes bloodshot beneath wet blond bangs that were churned three shades too dark.

He slopped water over the rails of the boat as he climbed back on board. Mikasa was quick to meet his side. Her eyes trailed to his fist, which curled around the item he stole from the sea. "What is it?"

Armin unfurled his fingers, expecting a shiny glint from his chalk white shell. But instead, he found a rock. Barnacles and sickly green algae decorated its surface. Armin's hopeful features fell, and he sighed. "I lost it."

Mikasa eyed him quizzically, "Lost what?"

"The conch." Armin tossed the rock back into the ocean, "The one I found four years ago, when we first came here. When Eren was still with us."

Mikasa stood there speechless for a moment. Then she slowly sunk down and joined her friend on the floorboards. "You kept it?" She questioned, plucking a strand of pink seaweed from his hair. "After all this time?"

The male set his arms on his knees and breathed, "I know it's stupid, but I used it as a reminder of--of how it used to be, back then."

Mikasa watched the sail above them flap in the wind, casting a shadow upon them. "I know. I did the same thing."

Reluctantly, she added, "Remember that scarf I used to wear all the time?"

Armin nodded, recalling a thought he had in the past, that the girl and her scarf were inseparable. 

"It was destroyed in the Rumbling, by the wall titans." Mikasa claimed, "I found it a little while ago, under the boards of a building. It was all just… red strings, thread, flayed at the ends. Nothing special."

She paused thoughtfully, maybe regretting that she even mentioned the subject. "I don't know if Eren knew how much it meant to me. But it was never the scarf itself that I cared about or wanted to protect, it was him." Another pause. 'I just… wanted to know, whether it was brainwashing, lies, or true, or not…"

The female choked up a bit, "Please, can you--Can you tell me, now that you have his memories?"

It was Armin's turn to pause then, and admire the way the sunlight brewed the sea into creamy, caramel-colored syrup or a sweet, honey wine.

"It was real, Mikasa." He said softly, "I promise, for both of us, it was all real."

Bittersweet tears swelled in the woman's eyes, masquerading as small specks of butterscotch even in the shade. 

Before he could react, she buried her face into the dip of his shoulder. Drowning out the sorrow and happiness that wracked through her form. She squeezed him tight. 

"Thank you," Mikasa gulped back a waver in her throat, "thank you."

It was only then that they realized their battle truly began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't be afraid to drop any thoughts or criticisms in the comments!  
Kudos and comments are the best things I get from writing, so please oblige.
> 
> As always, thank you for reading.


	4. Devils in Disguise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armin and Mikasa venture into the remains of Marley.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took a week extra to post because it's twice as long as the previous ones.  
Plus, I had to be sure to set the right tone for many scenes and characterize characters fittingly.
> 
> New warnings have been added as well, because things get real wild.
> 
> All I can say is, wow, this is a complex storyline. I did not nearly intend it to go this deep into the core of AOT, but here it is.
> 
> For the sake of spoilers, I'll save more notes at the end for those interested.
> 
> In the meantime, please enjoy.

Pale fingers prodded at the buttons and buckles of a Marleyan coat. Unclasping quickly at the burnt and ragged beige stitching. Plucking it as carefully as possible away from the body underneath. 

Mikasa rucked it over her shoulders, and blotted her face with chalky ash and charcoal. It was a meager disguise, its only purpose was to help her blend in with the survivors. It felt wrong. Invading a foreign land like they had many times before. To take more lives for a wish that wasn’t even their own.

It felt selfish. It was wrong. It wasn’t too late to turn back, go home, act like none of it ever happened.

Armin rubbed dirt over his own face beside her. He looked just as miserable as she did, yet determined. The expression reminded her of Eren. She couldn’t help but recall what he said about being slaves, being possessed, being blind.

It was all lies. Hypocrisy. Meaningless words Eren spat in order to keep them away, keep them safe. That’s what Armin told her, at least. 

The blond tugged the ripped ends of his own Marleyan coat over his head and snapped on a tattered belt around his waist. He looked up at her. “Are you ready?”

Mikasa nodded, hoping the uncertainty didn’t seep through her hardened features. The campfire they had seen was only a few blocks away from where they were. Armin could still see the smoke spewing up in the sky. It was a signal for help. But in their eyes, it was a beacon for prey.

And just as they planned, they took action.

When they first sailed up to the shore weeks prior, neither of them recognized the land as Marley.

At first, they thought that they took a wrong turn. Or maybe they stumbled upon another Eldian island like their own. But no, the black shadows of blades and hints of previous civilization were indeed Marley. 

When the boat thumped against the docks, they could hardly believe that they reached their destination. Mikasa’s boots clacked against the pebbles along the beaches shoreline. The ones she remembered jostling and slipping in when her squad first entered the war zone.

That was all they considered the Marleyans' home, their people, their culture -- A war zone. A place not worth cooperating with, much less trusting. The entrance to Hell, if anything.

But now, it was all just rubble. Destruction. That’s what her thoughts were as Armin guided her through the darkness of night, his hand squeezed tight around hers.

The flickering golden flames approached far too quickly for either of the soldiers’ hammering hearts. It reflected off the whites of their eyes, bounced off the debris of toppled buildings. 

They could see silhouettes once they were close enough. Humans, they realized, that were moving, slowly but noticeably. One was smaller, a child, perhaps. And the other one was sitting down, propping itself up with crutches. 

Their conversation became more coherent as well. Each word made the nausea in Armin and Mikasa worsen. Until it felt like they both swallowed a chain of iron.

“Can I _ please _ check it now?” Came an innocent, urgent request from the child. 

A soft, motherly voice sighed, “It’s too late, you should already be in bed. We can do it tomorrow.” 

“I’ll be quick, I promise.” The minor piped, “I just want to find a blanket for you. It’s getting close to winter, I think, I don’t want you to get cold.”

The female merely snorted, although it seemed forced. “You think I can’t handle a bit of cold? I’ve been through alot worse.”

“What about food? You didn’t have dinner at all today and I--I saw there’s no cans for breakfast tomorrow.” A pause. “I’ll be back in exactly five minutes, I swear. If don’t by then, I’ll let you go for the rest of the month.”

"...Ah, alright." The woman decided, giving in, "But only because there are none left. Five minutes, I'll be counting --- Ok, Falco?"

"Ok!"

Armin's heart dropped at the sound of the boy bounding off in the distance. Until the crackling of fire was all that could be heard. His eyes flicked to Mikasa, who could only stare back in horror.

She knew that it was their only chance. Any second wasted could lead to their downfall. Their cover to be blown. They needed to be quick, leave all the guilt and regret in the back of their mind. Like Eren did for them.

And so, they rehearsed what they practiced since the night they came.

"Hey!"

They approached the camp in unison, waving their arms. Carefully, as to not appear as a threat. "Is anyone there!? We're looking for survivors!"

The Marleyan woman's shadow peeped up at Armin's seemingly earnest words. The duo could almost feel her pupils tracking them up and down, although they were obscured by strands of ink black hair. Through the haze of yellow light from the fire, she looked dreadfully familiar.

Her pale skin was even paler somehow. Freckled with sores of sickness and rings of grey around brown eyes. They were faint, however, fading away slowly as if she were recovering from a deadly disease.

A titan shifter. 

Armin's fake words of reassurance fell dead in his throat as he bit his tongue. He internally cursed at himself for not seeing it coming. There was no way she wouldn’t recognize them --- The two Eldian soldiers who attacked her on the day of the Rumbling; Faces blotched with muck and fake bandages, donned in stolen Marleyan militia clothing.

He prayed she didn't notice, and he gathered his bearings.

"We've been searching for miles, to help people get back into civilization. We have a boat ready to take you there." 

It wasn't necessarily a lie, but it did everything but line up with their true intentions.

Mikasa could see the gears cranking in the older woman's head. Glancing between them a moment with a hint of disgust. A poisonous look dashed with anger. But just as fast as it appeared, it vanished, and her face laxed into false relief and happiness.

"Oh, is that so? We've been waiting months for some company." Her tone was still as sweet as honey, "It must've been a lot of trouble getting out here --- in the middle of nowhere. Almost… coincidental, if I must say."

She narrowed her eyes ever so slightly, and folded her hands in her lap. "So, how many others have you saved and brought back to civilization?"

Her words were practically a mockery at that point. Armin was tempted to reach behind his waist and yank the sword from its sheath. Anything other than facing the shame of what he was doing.

Regardless, he answered, "You're… you're our first. But we’ve been searching Marley for a long time. All we found were fallen cities and dead bodies. Finding you might as well be proof that miracles can happen."

The Marleyan smiled at him. "They do indeed."

The silence that came afterwards was nauseating.

"We can save the boy, too." Mikasa spoke up, voice barely wavering, "When he returns."

Something in the Marleyan broke at the mention. But pieced back together before it was obvious. “Good, good. He deserves to have a good home after all he’s been through.” Her hand slipped into the pocket of her jeans as she spoke, “He’s lost a lot of people. Friends, family… something a child should never experience. I’m sure you two would understand.”

Armin watched her fingers pull back, dragging a knife behind her wrist. He bit his lip.

The lady seemed to take notice. "...Didn't know our saviors had the tendency to spy on civilians without their consent." She breathed, barely loud enough for her captors to hear, "...and it’s kind of ironic how the God of Destruction comes to our rescue."

The color would've drained from Armin's face if he hadn't expected the words.

The woman’s voice rose. "I don’t know why you’re here, or what you want from us. I may be too weak to transform, but I will if that’s what it takes for you to leave. So I recommend that you run back to wherever the hell you came.”

It was an empty threat, considering how fast she was beaten the day of the rumbling. But her bluff still managed to cut the two soldiers deep.

No sound uttered from either of their lips. They were hesitating, didn't know what to do, what to say, how to react---Unluckily, the Marleyan decided to react for them.

Without warning, her blade swung at Armin’s neck, aiming straight for his windpipe, his weak point. Mikasa’s sword slashed within a millisecond, and the Marleyan’s knife and hand fell to the ground in a spurt of blood. The Marleyan yelped in shock.

"I--It's the only way to end the titan curse!" Mikasa blurted out insistently.

"To kill a _ child?" _The Marleyan woman grasped what remained of her right hand to her chest--- jabbing an accusing finger at them. "Imagine if he were your son! Would you kill him, sacrifice him for such insanity? What if all your efforts were for nothing?"

Armin balled his fists so tight his knuckles turned white. The woman continued painfully, "Have you _ ever _ considered that?"

"Yes." Armin claimed wearily, his hand automatically slipped to his hip, "Yes… yes, we both did."

His and Mikasa’s eyes met again. Knowing that their ploy had failed, they had no other choice. And the time remaining until five minutes was ticking fast.

What happened next was a blur. They unsheathed their dual blades, chopped flesh, soared tens of blocks away with the woman in hand, who was thrashing the whole time. Armin dropped to the ocean before he exploded with a blinding flash. 

Lightning engulfed the sky.

...

Hisses and curses spilled from the small boy as he rummaged through garbage. His hands scrabbled frantically at each lump of cardboard, before he ultimately kicked them in frustration. They were all empty.

Falco paid no mind to the strike of thunder and lightning in the background. He reeled his leg back and slammed his foot into a box of empty wine bottles. The sound of glass shattering pierced the air, accompanied by the clatter of more useless junk.

The boy flung his leg back and struck it again, again, and again. Pathetically venting out childish anger and sorrow of how bad things had gotten. Everything that went wrong.

_ ‘It’s not fair. What did we do to deserve this?’ _

Deep down, Falco wondered if that was how the Paradis Eldians felt. Gabi saw it. He saw it, too. They were all just normal people, like everyone else. Reduced to nothing because of what they were classified as. And now, they were all suffering because of it. Everyone was. 

Falco glanced back at the valley of vanquished houses, which was once a brisk, lively town square. He remembered running down the street with Gabi, Zofia, and Udo. Everyone was celebrating and gathering at the auditorium to hear Mr. Tybur’s speech.

That was the day Eren coaxed him to bring Reiner into the basement. For a ‘talk’ that would end up obliterating everything before his eyes. Everyone he loved. 

Bitter tears stung at Falco’s eyes then. It was all his fault. Falling for such a trick. Being deceived so easily.

So naive, so childish, so stupid. Maybe if he had just said ‘no’ and never came, maybe things would be different. Maybe the titans never would’ve emerged from the walls, maybe his family wouldn’t have been split apart, or forced to flee back to Marley.

Maybe Reiner wouldn’t have left, maybe Gabi would still be alive, maybe--

_ Dammit, five minutes must’ve passed!! _

Falco swore to himself once more, and snatched his lantern from the floor. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he forgot to check the last house down the street. But he hated leaving Piek alone in the middle of the night, he felt like he was putting her in danger.

Flinging a half-empty bag over his shoulder, he raced outside. Hopping back over broken slabs of rock, searching for the telltale burst of smoke or a flicker of fire in the distance. 

Instead, his feet skidded to a halt and he froze. 

There was someone standing in the alleyway. It was an older boy, no older than twenty at most. He was holding a torch, highlighting the splotches of dirt that streaked his pale face, almost as if they had been drawn on. He had a stubby pink nose and striking blue eyes. Overshadowed by disheveled and messy yellow bangs. His arms were crossed over his chest, and his frightened expression gradually became relaxed and welcoming.

“You must be Falco.” He remarked.

Falco couldn’t even begin to respond. Already shook up enough that there was another survivor standing right in front of him. The younger boy felt his heart pound with uncertainty, as he recalled the last time he trusted a crippled man in a military uniform.

But this one looked younger, healthier, brighter, more trustworthy. Not dirty, ratty and foul like the last. There was no reason for anything underhanded in the apocalypse, was there? What would this soldier gain by luring Falco into any filthy deeds? 

“Me and my friend have been searching for survivors of the Rumbling. Your companion has already been taken to safety, I assure you.” The older male continued. “She told me where you were, said she didn’t want to leave you behind.”

Falco noted the soldier’s haggard beige coat. He disregarded the lack of an armband and badges, which could have burnt off during the fires and mayhem. 

There was a possibility he was telling the truth. Maybe he truly was a surviving Marleyan. Maybe Falco was just paranoid after what happened before.

“You’re a survivor? Who came to save us?” He couldn’t bring himself to believe it. It was too good to be true. “I--I had a feeling that someone would come to help us. But I can’t believe it happened so soon…er, j-just thank you, sir.”

The older male smiled faintly at him. The boy didn’t quite notice how fast it faded. “I’ll let you two reunite once you give me a favor, I hope you don’t mind.”

Falco’s stomach dropped at his words, but he attempted to recollect himself. "What do you mean?” The question was blurted out far too quickly. 

The soldier eyed the boy regretfully, releasing a breath, “I’m required to tell you… The female titan has been recovered. We've learned that she's been encased in a crystal prison for at least three years now. We need you to use your Jaw Titan to break her out.”

Falco’s lips went slack at the news, “The female titan…? But she’s been lost to Paradis for more than a decade.” He instinctively reeled back a step, “And how do you know I inherited the Jaw? Everyone on the island died when the Rumbling began..."

“News travels fast.” The older blond claimed, “Those who survive pick up on it eventually. Same with the news of the female titan.” 

Falco’s eyes cast downward uncertainly, his pulse still hammering hard in his chest. 

Could this soldier be trusted? He pondered, biting the inside of his cheek. But if he was telling the truth, if he did have a clan and an army and Piek -- then Falco had no other choice. There was no way he could survive in the streets on his own. And the chance of rescue was slim enough as it was.

It would be far too coincidental for the survivor to have any relations to Eren anyways, wouldn’t it? 

Gulping back his fear and twisting his face into dutiful courage, the boy lifted his head.

“I’ll do it.”

…

The cave was hidden in the farside of the city. At the mouth of a lifeless black lake, and the remains of what looked to be an abandoned military base.

The tunnel was dark and desolate. Its craggy walls hung over the two, stealing away the last speck of light from the entrance behind them.

Falco and the Marleyan soldier -- whose name he learned was Armin -- dwelled deeper. Their boots sloshed through gruel-like muck, resulting in a disgusting wet slurping noise.

Impulsively, Falco wondered if Armin was leading him to his demise. If he had lied about the female titan and had just lead him to the outskirts of town to kill him. Or, dare he say, anything _ worse. _

Falco glanced nervously at the older blond, then back ahead of him. The corridor in the darkness lit into an odd ghostly blue. Which only grew closer with each step further. 

But for now, it only remained as a small glint at the end of the cavern. With nothing but their sloppy footsteps and glops of water guiding their way.

The boy contemplated striking up a conversation again. Most of what he said earlier, at the camp, was just small talk. Consisting of a mere ‘How are you?’ and a few renditions of ‘What's the world like outside of Marley?'

If he was walking into a death sentence, Falco wanted to at least explain himself a bit. Maybe that way, Armin would pity him and maybe even consider sparing his life. As desperate as that sounded, the minor was willing to take a chance.

“...I had a friend a while ago.” Falco began, attempting to make the encounter as casual as possible, “I still remember her, every now and then. Even though she’s been gone for... well, a while. We used to go on adventures, have fun, do things I’d never forget. Just like normal kids.” The boy cracked a small smile, “She was so reckless and loud, pretty much the opposite of me.”

Armin’s face softened slightly, seeming slightly reflectful as well. “I knew someone like that, too” He claimed.

Before the mood could turn sour, Falco continued, “She always got into trouble. Put herself in danger, and I had to get her out of it all the time. But we still stuck together, because that’s what friends do.” Falco fiddled with the sleeves of his dirty sweater, “Was that what it was like for you?”

Armin nodded, appearing mournful, “Yeah. Only, we weren’t able to stick together in the end. It was like… we were oil and water.”

The smaller boy nodded back. He hesitated. “...What happened?”

“He wanted to… change the world. Fix what people did wrong by betraying everyone he loved. He did it for the greater good, but I didn’t see it until--until it was over.” Armin elaborated, sorrow coating his features. “I just wish I could’ve understood sooner.”

“Did he succeed?” Falco asked curiously, raising a brow. 

Armin paused before he managed another slow nod, ”He did what he could. All he could handle, until he reached his limits.”

“Sounds kinda familiar.” Falco offered a chuckle, which came out a bit strained.

"Only…" The boy trailed, almost wanting to continue. His tongue stopped short. _ '...she didn't win.' _

He glanced back at the end of the hall, which was only a few yards away. And slowly, the quiet eeriness inevitably seeped into the mood again.

Armin swung open a wooden door to reveal the chamber hidden inside.

There was a girl in a crystal, just as the soldier promised. The mineral gushed a brilliant turquoise color, engulfing the whole room in all of its glory. Both blinding and hypnotic as the two approached. 

Falco could hardly believe his eyes. He reached out a hand and stroked the smooth surface, which felt like glass. It felt so fragile, as if it would crack under his fingertips, but it didn’t budge.

“Your titan is the only thing that can break it.” Armin said beside him, inspecting a small silver ring between his fingers. “I’ve only heard rumors. But this is the only chance we have of setting her free. Whether it kills her or not, you have to try."

“But _ how?” _Falco asked, in disbelief of what he had to do. He pulled himself away from the crystal, “I haven’t transformed in months. The last time I did was to save my friend and my commander back in Paradis. After that I...I never wanted to use it again.”

Armin frowned, glancing once more at the crystal, then back at his ring, before stuffing it back in his pocket. “Trust me, I know. Just… maybe not the way you’d expect.”

Before the boy could ask, he continued, “All you have to do is halfway transform and bite the center of the crystal, which will split it apart enough for it to crack.”

“You really think I can do it?” Falco tried.

Armin almost hesitated.

“It’s worth a shot.”

\--

Beneath the beast’s teeth, the gem began to crackle and splinter. Crevices widened and gaped, tarnishing the once perfect shell of the beautiful prison. Shards began to shed like an unraveling cocoon.

The rocks fell to the floor, crackling a strange sound similar to shattered glass or wind chimes. Cracks travelled down like spiderwebs, and the crags split apart once they reached the base.

Armin expected the girl to be ripped apart right with it -- being forced in two directions at once, maybe her limbs being torn from her in a bloody mess. Like he and Mikasa had already seen once tonight, and expected to at least three times more.

But instead, Annie fell limply forward, into a pile of glass. She hit the floor right as her confines crumbled completely apart behind her.

Armin instantly rushed to her side, genuine panic and shock gushing in his eyes. He stabilized her in his arms, brushing silky strands of platinum blonde from her almost-lifeless face.

His hands instinctively searched for her pulse on her neck, wrist, chest -- anywhere. 

Once he found that telltale ‘thrum,’ the relief that washed over him was overpowering. But so was the horrifying realization that hit him afterwards. It throbbed like a red-hot nail was pierced straight into his chest.

Armin didn’t hear Falco clammer from his titan. He only heard his soft, hesitant footsteps in the background. The soldier was sure the boy was inspecting the scene before him in awe.

Hell, Armin could hardly believe it worked himself.

“Thank you,” He heard himself say, in both breathlessness and shame. “Thank you, thank you, _ thank you… _” 

He sat like that for a while. Squatted on the ground with Annie’s head in the crook of his shoulder. Felt the way her slow, steady breaths tickled his neck, and how his ankles ached for relief. But he barely noticed.

Then, he gently pulled away and laid her to the floor. The blond stared back at Falco, who was still standing there watching. Maybe both enraptured and speechless by what he just witnessed.

Regardless, Armin stood to his feet and walked towards him. The words he rehearsed left his lips automatically. “I’ll take you back to your friend,"

He was coming too close, he realized. He already had his hand behind his back, gripping the hilt of his sword. 

Armin felt no better than Eren in that split second.

He might as well have been wearing a fake cast and eyepatch and cut off his fucking leg just like Eren did. Hell, he might as well have a tuft of sparse peach fuzz to complete the same disguise.

It may not have been easy to think about, but it was far too damn easy to lure a child into a death trap like this. Armin could see in Falco’s eyes that he knew it, too. That he had been played like a fiddle _ again _. Only now, he was going to die because of it.

In an instant, Falco snapped a pistol from his pocket and trained it on him. He pulled the trigger within a second, and the bullet tore into Armin’s face. His left eye, coincidentally where Eren’s bandage once was.

The bullet would’ve killed a normal person, just by its impact alone. But the steam erupting from Armin’s deadly injury stated otherwise. His skin had already begun steadily knitting back together.

The terror on Falco’s face was indescribable. Pure mortification as he realized there were more than two titan shifters in the room. His finger clicked futilely at his guns trigger, but no gunshot came. No bullets.

Through the agony that was ringing in Armin’s head, he internally prayed that Annie wouldn’t wake up to this. Anything but this.

He drew his sword and raised it over his head, trying to ignore Falco’s desperate pleads and shrieks that would inevitably haunt him for the rest of his life. 

The blade came down.

…

The lakes waves never stopped thrashing.

Neither did the smoke spilling from the husk of the Colossal Titan beside it. 

There was a sour taste in Armin’s mouth that wouldn’t go away.

He sorted through the culmination of thoughts swarming in his brain, each one made him feel all the more guilty. He listened to the trickle of water against the shore. Each one might as well have been a slap to the face.

Before long, he heard the crack of 3D maneuver gear rapidly approaching in the distance. Then, the cautious steps of rubber boots grating against riverstones.

Although he wasn’t looking at her, he could still imagine Mikasa's eyes grazing the remnants of his titan. 

He heard her clear her throat, as if debating whether or not to interrupt the haunting silence. 

“...I found Reiner on the east coast of the city." She said. "I took care of him for the time being. Based on his state, it will… take awhile for him to regenerate.”

Armin hummed in response, fiddling with a piece of rock in his hands. Mikasa only frowned.

"Did it work?” She asked.

The question was inevitable. The blond mutely nodded, and stood to his feet. He swept the dust off his pants, where stains of deep red still remained. 

Mikasa didn’t have to ask to know why.

“You should watch her, just in case she wakes up." Armin said, "I’ll finish off Reiner.” 

He was about to walk past her, just finish the job and get it over with -- like he kept telling himself over and over. But Mikasa stopped him, gently but firmly grabbing his wrist. 

“Are you sure?” The question had weight to it, felt genuine. “I can cuff Annie’s arms or just plain cut them off if you want.” She offered.

“You know that won’t last long if she wakes up.” Armin digressed, “She’s smart, but clueless. She’ll transform as soon as you give her the chance. You have to tell her that she has nothing to run back to, so she understands.”

“I know that boy’s memories will impact you, or effect you, at least. You told me that he was the one Eren manipulated, how he knew Reiner and the Marleyans. It could make things harder than it has to be.” Mikasa retorted.

“I can handle it.” Armin reassured, “I’ll try, at least. If there are any problems, I’ll let you know.”

The female grit her teeth slightly, before she released his arm from her grasp.

Just two more left.

###

The scraggly thin tree roots slithered beneath the sod of a halfway crushed mound.

It looked more like a lump in the Earth’s crust than a hill. And part of the tree was uprooted, the other part crunched into splinters. Dotted with decaying and web-like grey leaves that left a foul odor in the air.

The bleached overcast sky did nothing to relieve the sheer emptiness of the scenery. It all seemed blank, lifeless. 

There was a long stretch of rope wound around the trees thick trunk. Armin didn’t have to peek around the fibers to figure out who it was restraining. Instead, he watched the figure perk up at the _ crunch _ of his feet on dead leaves.

“I knew you’d come.” Reiner hissed, his once familiar tone was gruff and gravelly, hardly recognizable. 

From what Armin could see of the man’s face, it was aged and sunken. It was unclear whether it was from Ymir's curse or his own doings. But he did match the man flickering in Falco’s memories, only much more broken and devastated. 

“It… it’s strange how you can still try to look me in the eye after all you’ve done. After taking everything away from me." Reiner seemed on the brink of a sob. The seconds dragged on like the continuous thump of his heartbeat.

“I lost a little girl because of you. She was with Falco, desperately searching for food and water in this hell you’ve created.” The angry words were thick enough to shatter.

“I--I could’ve saved her. Gave her the armored titan like I promised I would. But by the time I found her, it was too late. So I ran away like a coward. Tr-Tried to see if I could die the same way. But now, I realized that shifters can’t. They only feel the pain and suffer, there’s never any relief. And I’m too scared to die any other way." He gulped past a lump in his throat, "This... is a fitting death for a coward like me. So please, just--just get it over with.”

Reiner gave enough courage to turn his head, to meet those piercing eyes of redemption. Revenge. Ones who were willing to steal away everything they touched. Ones he was sure he had at some point. Eyes of a thief, a monster.

“Now I finally understand how you feel. And I just want to say… I’m sorry, Eren. I-I’m so sorry…"

Reiner’s words finally shattered, and Armin met him eye to eye. The man was truly a tormented soul at that moment. 

_ “...Armin?” _

Horror hung in the air like a fist gripping both of their throats. 

“Eren… died in Shiganshina, the day of the Rumbling.” Armin explained. He could only watch as the puzzle pieces slowly slotted in Reiner’s head. His face blanched white.

“No--no, no, no… You--you could’ve stopped this. Th-This endless cycle of death--of families losing each other--of chaos leashing the world--”

The man saw the shifting of Armin’s eyes, he stuttered, “You could’ve stopped all of it. Why didn't you…!?"

“I am.” Armin merey stated, rolling a silver ring past his palm and over a finger. Reiner could only stare at it in terror.

“The only way to stop bloodshed is with more bloodshed. It may be selfish, but there’s no other way…" He trailed off a bit, "That’s what Eren told me before I killed him -- and that’s the oath I chose to keep. One person has the power to change everything.”

With that, Reiner’s ropes were slashed and a blinding flash of yellow filled his vision. 

When he was able to open up his eyes, he saw the chest of a monster.

Curls of a partway transformed ribcage jabbed into the crust of the Earth. Stabbing deep into the rock-hard clay floor in order to keep it in place. The giant rolls of red muscle were clear, and practically drooling with steam.

At first, Reiner thought that, somehow, Bertholt had spawned from nowhere. Swooped in and transformed in order to rescue him from death. 

For him to leap out of the Colossal's nape, smile, and embrace him, and tell him that everything was going to be alright.

The cruel fantasy could not be farther from the truth. But soon, Reiner's death wish was granted, at last.

…

The candlelight wafted with the next weary breath that left the blond’s nose. 

Liquid cascaded down the white wax tinged yellow by the light of the fire. The cave was still dark and empty despite it.

Each drop of water echoed through the walls like a prison. Which, of course, it was.

Mikasa had left for supplies only fifteen minutes ago, but it felt like hours. Armin found himself inspecting the deep crimson wine bottle beside him. From the cursive writing on the label, to the specks of dust sprinkled on the glass. His fingers instinctively smeared a few lines away.

It didn’t seem expired, as far as he could tell. He never drank alcohol before. The Zeke-spinal-fluid incident sure refrained him from doing so, but now he found himself tempted.

Mainly, to rinse and wash the memories away. Forget everything. But that would be the coward’s way out. And also because he wanted to have a good first impression for when Annie arose, so he wouldn’t be suspicious. _ If _she even arose.

Time ticked by. Seconds by minutes, and minutes by hours. 

Armin tapped his finger on the table with a ‘clink, clink, clink.’ His face was sickly pale under the light of the candle and his nose kept oozing red. The handkerchief in his right hand was already almost completely blotched with blood.

A pounding headache was another cruel side effect of transforming one too many times. Armin found himself dreading the moment Annie woke up -- if she did. Because then, he would have to do it one more time. One last time. 

But then it would be over. He and Mikasa’s mission would be complete, besides the final part when they returned to Shiganshina. The deaths would be all be done -- a clear, yet faded memory left to rot in the back of his head. He could pretend like none of this ever--

“Armin…?”

The voice crashed into Armin hard enough to knock him back into reality. It took all the strength he had to look over his shoulder and see the sight he had been fearing for months. Somehow worse than introducing himself to Falco. Worse than killing an innocent motherly woman and his previous military comrade. 

Annie was lifting herself up with her elbows, and staring at him as if he were a ghost. The male approached, cautiously, as to not startle her further.

"How… how long has it…?" Slipped the woman's dazed lips.

"Five years." Armin replied, "...Everyone is dead, except for most Eldians. Eren killed everyone else with the Rumbling."

Annie shrunk back to the floor slightly, trying to comprehend her situation. She was five years into the future, her dad was gone, she failed to abort her mission, and what the hell was a 'rumbling?' How did it kill everyone outside the walls?

"I… I need to do something I really don't want to do." Armin confessed painfully. Annie caught the nervous flicking of his eyes. Unsurity. Contemplation. The male was far too close for comfort.

"I see…" Was all she said. She noticed a glint of silver behind his waist and her hand automatically dipped into her cloak. She should've known that Armin would take notice.

Quick as the strike of a snake, her dagger dove into the muscle of his back, not deep enough to kill him, if it was able, only enough to paralyze him with pain momentarily. Instead, he merely flinched.

Little did she know, he was fast as well. His own knife struck and sunk to the root in her shoulder. Steam instantly began to spill, and Annie’s eyes bugged at the sight of it wafting from Armin.

“No…” She stammered incoherently, shaking her head. She seemed genuinely horrified, and her knife popped free. “No--no, which one--which did you…”

“Bertholt was the first.” Armin answered sadly, a ghostly blankness in his eyes. Ones that were once spry and full of life. “There’s been more… since then.”

_ 'The Colossal.' _The thought sat on Annie’s tongue like bile. Like the creases on her cheeks and brow that had already begun to form. She tried to back away, wondered if she could pinch herself and awaken back in Paradis. Escape from this nightmare.

“I saw his memories.” Armin remarked, “Saw how things used to be for you… back then.” 

There was a strange weight in the air, Annie noticed. Heavy, like uncertainty, yet also strained with fondness, admiration.

No, this wasn’t the same boy she once knew. He might’ve looked like him, but he wasn’t.

Cold, calculative eyes behind a shadow was all she could see. That stupid yellow mop of hair was still there, yet shorter. And he looked he looked different, more mature, older. 

Annie kept telling herself that it wasn’t him, couldn’t be him. It had been too long. Unless he had been the one she heard behind the crystal. Words about Marley, and killing, and death and destruction. Seeking comfort and reassurance.

The thought made her rise to her feet, knees wobbling. She whipped out her knife again, staring at the one Armin still had grasped tightly between his fingers.

_ 'He's going to kill me.' _ Her blue eyes grew, and her knife raised. 

“You’re not who you used to be.” Her voice shook, “I can see them all in your eyes. _ Him _ in your eyes.”

Armin cast his head downwards shamefully, his arm shifting to reveal the sharp bloodied sword he had been hiding behind his back. 

“I don’t want to. Trust me, Annie, I wish I could give you another chance. You’re…” The young man sucked in a breath, “...you’re the last one left.”

Annie’s stare grew frantic. “It’s…” Armin continued, “It’s what Eren wanted. I can’t let him down when I’ve come so far..” His voice was strained as if in pain.

The sword drove into her limbs so fast it might as well just have been her imagination. But the stings of pain erupting from her limbs wasn't. Nor was the skeletal face that was gazing down at her from above.

Surrounded by a starry night sky with puffs of beige grey clouds. When did she get outside? She wanted to wonder, but instead, she was mesmerized by the monster standing meters before her.

It had no nose, an exposed ribcage and throat, pursed red lips and Armin's eyes. She couldn't believe it, couldn't accept it.

Her thoughts spun like a spinning wheel. Recalling what Armin's words were five years ago, when her disguise was revealed. As his teeth came down on her, and she heard that awful _ crack _she never wanted to hear again, she realized that she finally understood how he felt.

As soon as Armin's feet hit the floor, he crumbled to his knees. His face was wet, slick with those familiar pink tears that trickled down the titan marks. Which now felt like scars, curses. Sobs scalded his throat, but he couldn't stop.

Not until the tears stopped falling and the room returned to its eerie, penetrative silence. Armin's head never stopped spinning, however. The heavy iron in his gut kept getting heavier and heavier until he was hacking up blood.

Blackness tinged at the lenses of his vision, but never fully enveloped him. Instead, he laid, sprawled out on the stone floor, thirsting for alcohol and Mikasa's footsteps more than ever.

It was over.

###

The sunlight bloomed across the surface of the ocean. Licking off of waves in thick orange and pink strides.

Armin hung over the side of the boat, dipping his fingers in the water to disturb the smooth liquid surface. He heard the familiar _ thump _of bare feet on the floorboards, and didn't need to tilt his head to see who it was.

"Feeling better?" Mikasa inquired, sliding a hand over the damp metal railing. Armin cleared his throat a bit, muttering a half hearted, "Yeah."

Mikasa sighed through her nose, peering up into the horizon with him. "I know it wasn't easy. Honestly, I thought it wasn't even possible when you told me. I thought we would give up and turn back as soon as we had the chance, but…" Another drained sigh, "I can't believe we did it."

"Neither can I." Armin chimed in, trying to repel the onslaught of memories that would inevitably plague him forever, "Now that we've left, it just feels like a bad dream. Not completely, but… it's strange."

The blond trailed off, ogling back at the shimmering water. Relishing the calm, cool breeze. Ironic, after all he experienced.

"What do we do now?" Mikasa spoke up, "Since… you said you'd wait to tell me." 

Armin folded his hands together, that same tired, yet electric and calculating look zapping back. "Once we get back, we need to tell everyone to evacuate. Pack up their belongings and sail to Marley."

"Back to Marley?" Mikasa noted, confused.

A spark seemed to ignite. "There are still survivors out there, believe it or not. People who have miraculously survived the impossible. We need to pretend that all the Eldians died out by the Wall Titans and that we are the last Marleyans left. It's the only way to end this cycle. Abandon everything, blend in, rebuild, repopulate. That way, no one will know the truth."

Mikasa's eyes went wide, "Armin--"

"--That was Eren's plan, Mikasa. He passed it onto us because he knew we could do it. Eldia had a bounty on him after the day of the Rumbling -- he knew he was going to die. And he knew if he did, without passing on his titan, nothing would be solved." Armin insisted.

"But migrating _ everyone _to Marley? To a place of destruction when they barely have anything as it is?" Mikasa pointed out, "What if those people---survivors---get suspicious of us? What if they find out? How do you know it will work?"

"It will work once we tell everyone why." Armin declared, "This is the only way for our bloodline to survive without committing more mass genocide. It's always been impossible to wipe out everyone in the world. If there's nothing for them to fear, there's no reason for war, right?"

Mikasa's charcoal eyes fell on the small speck of land in the horizon. Paradis Island. Their home. The home they were currently debating on abandoning. 

"If it's the only way, then…" She pondered deeply, listening to the boat rock gently with the ocean waves.

Mikasa remembered watching blood fly from her dying comrades. The soldiers they once loved that were beaten and murdered right before her eyes. Some that were never seen again.

_ Connie, Jean, Sasha, Eren… _She recalled, her jaw tensing. 

The military squad she and Armin had that were ripped apart. Six torn into two.

The female faltered a bit, considering.

"We might not have a choice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll go over a few quick details here.
> 
> The "small silver ring" Armin has is a small detail featured in the manga. (Mainly in chapter 104)  
It's what he uses to transform because of the hidden blade it has, which was most likely inspired from Annie's.
> 
> In this story, Armin is able to 'half-transform' so he doesn't accidentally nuke everyone instead of taking their powers. I doubt that it's possible to do in canon, but it makes things alot less complicated for this story.
> 
> As usual, feel free to leave any thoughts or drabbles in the comments.
> 
> Drop any theories and predictions for the manga as well! And stay tuned for the next and final chapter.


	5. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sacrifices must be made in order for freedom to last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here it is dear readers, the finale, at last. The plot twist for this ending hit me like a truck this Saturday, so hopefully it will break you just as much as it broke me. 
> 
> It starts off a bit slow and summarized on purpose, but once everything starts rolling, it will all make sense.
> 
> I'll add a few ending notes here, since I feel like including notes after the ending ruins the devastation of the conclusion.^^ So check back after you've read, and you'll hopefully understand.
> 
> The quote at the start of the chapter is from this gorgeous AOT animation here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q6WeBvjdGK8&list=FLWR8e6hpqiUK2IydsZn_aTg&index=2&t=3s
> 
> It really establishes my feelings for this story and Attack on Titan's time skip in general. Go check it out if you can, trust me, you won't regret it.
> 
> According to to the Swedish Dictionary, "Vem där?" means "Who's there?" in English.
> 
> This was coincidentally completed when the manga updated yet again. And oh lord, it might be my favorite chapter so far. An absolute masterpiece, as always. 
> 
> Thank you so much to all who've read this far. And to those who stuck with this story to its bitter end, against the odds. I always put a ton of effort, including blood, sweat, and tears into my writing and I hope that it makes this read worthwhile. 
> 
> I might write a few more works for AOT soon, since the ending to the manga seems to be rapidly approaching. Maybe a few one shots of canon, AUs, I might get creative.
> 
> Once again, thank you to those who've left feedback and please don't hesitate to drop more. Just because the story's done doesn't mean I'm not dying to see what you'd like to say! But then again, the choice is yours. 
> 
> Last but not least, please enjoy.

_ “If you just believe all of this cycling hatred, all of these endless conflicts will one day settle. Isn’t it possible to love this country? _

_The sky looks a little lower than it did yesterday, but I won’t let any shadow fall on my smile. _ _Just a bit further, let’s walk just a bit further on. _

_Another ten years, another hundred years… This world will keep changing. We may not be here to see it, but there are still things I want to protect. _

_ There's no turning back, I just keep walking further down this road.” _

_Chata, “Kawariyuku Sekai no Tame ni.”//”For the Sake of the Future.”_

The brittle sod beneath the soldiers’ feet felt almost foreign to them. 

Bursts of chilly winter air slapped into them as soon as they left their base.

After their eyes tracked every cursive word from the letter the Queen had sent them. It was an invitation, and a response to the one they had sent her four days prior.

They flashed it to every guard and knight they passed. To the thickly armored and straight-faced men at the gates.

Until rich auburn, swirls of fiery orange, and stripes of brown carpet were at their feet.

The scent of bitter licorice and perfume stung their noses. Then, almost an instant after they entered, a young woman spun down the hall and rushed towards them.

Her formal robes, dress, and jewelry were gone. Leaving her donned in a casual baby blue house gown.

With her platinum blonde locks free and splayed at her shoulders, her eyes gushing with the need for answers -- she looked no different than she did as a recruit. Back when she was just Christa.

"So." Historia began, sorrow already tingling her frail voice, "You're the last ones left."

It wasn't a question, it was a remark.

"The last soldiers." Mikasa reluctantly corrected, "Levi and Hange are still alive. Retired, thankfully, and alive."

"That's all?" The Queen tested.

The two officers could only nod in response.

Armin pricked at a flayed string on his gloves, telling Historia about the memorial they planned. A mourning for all the families and soldiers they'd lost. Along with an important announcement they wanted to broach to the public. He asked if she wanted to join them as a speaker.

Which, of course, she agreed. She told them how devastated she was when she heard the news of destruction. How it happened too fast for her to do anything to stop it, much less get involved.

Tentatively, she asked what happened to the rest of the titan shifters. Armin skimmed over most of the details, but explained that they were killed. And their powers would most likely be passed down the line.

When the ceremony arose, thousands of Eldians gathered and crowded through the remnants of a once proud town square. Commotion had already begun to unfurl from the masses of people. 

Inquiries of “What do we do next?” and “What’s the government planning to do?” Joined the moist breeze of the village.

Hange lumbered over the stage with a stump of a leg and crutches, while a recruit steered Levi's wheelchair to the podium. 

The commanders rang the names of the dead like items on a shopping list. It seemed almost endless. 

When it was finished, Historia stepped up to the speaker and began her speech on the lost soldiers. Her words slowly trailed to the controversy regarding her bloodline.

She told them how she managed to cling onto faith against the odds, and that everyone needed to do the same. 

That there was a light at the end of the darkness. They had a future.

And, whether they liked it or not, they needed to be grateful that Eren did what he did.

He had successfully saved his people against the odds.

When Historia began to rehearse the plan, Mikasa noticed Armin slip his hand to the blonde's shoulder from the side. 

He was offering her comfort, perhaps. Knowing that the announcement would be a start to a new beginning, a new era for their people.

Mikasa didn't notice the way Armin's eyes glinted before he shut them, nor the way the Queen's voice grew robotic as the words of Eldians becoming Marleyans fell from her lips. 

Only remembered shuffling off stage with them, a strange headache buzzing in her head.

Just as promised, the ships started sailing roughly three months after their return. 

Strangely, no mutiny or outbreaks of hysteria broke out like they expected. Mikasa decided it was just the town's pure desperation to survive and continue into the future.

For weeks, the boats sailed back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.

Until all the Eldians had settled to the crumbs of Marley. With nothing but food, water, and their families to guide their way. It would take years before the land would be rebuilt into one they could pretend was their own.

What remained of the Survey Corps were used as spies. A few hundred soldiers sent across seas to observe faraway and neighboring regions. 

Most they ended up seeing were completely obliterated. Blundered and botched with radiation with no speck of humanity in sight. The atmosphere was discolored into a murky mustard and pale. Nearly apocalyptic. 

It reminded Armin and Mikasa of when the rumbling began. Only, these parts of the world were scarred, incinerated because of it, and may remain so forever. 

The two often wandered beyond the borders of camp. Found themselves catching glimpses of things they used to see in books - once memories of mere drawings beside swarms of text. 

Ones that were once blocked by the nubs of young Armin and Eren’s fingertips. Jabbing eagerly at each with heavy words on their tongues, all with varied meanings of the terms “Discovery,” and “Freedom.”

While Mikasa mostly watched, amused at their enthusiasm. Recalling how bland and bored Eren used to be in the past. Peering at rolls of gliding clouds and taking naps under the tree in the fields. But that all changed once he met Armin.

Blades of mountains protruded through sparse patches of clouds. Stacked and stacked with smelters of rock and green fuzz. All it seemed was a fat lump of boulders to everyone else, but to Armin and Mikasa, it was like witnessing a miracle for the first time.

The sight took their breath away. Like the sketches in their childhood book were splattered with color and life, and wisped into reality. But miraculously, that wasn’t all.

Icy glaciers, bursts of tropical trees on miniature islands, natural spouts of rivers, jungles, silt and brine of secluded caves, harsh hot dust-gold deserts, pieces of abandoned cities and towns -- they saw all of it.

They never expected any of it to be real, or not to have been demolished by the rumbling. Some part of them thought that it was just a dream or hallucination, too good to be true. 

But the hard stone of lost streets and soft grass tickling their feet told them otherwise. It was real. Almost as if Eren did it on purpose -- in his last moments of consciousness. Maneuvered the Wall Titans into a path that wouldn’t destroy the beauty, and savour it for them.

Mikasa brought up the idea to Armin -- who glanced up at the sky and bit his bottom lip.

“I wouldn’t doubt it.” Was all he said.

A few nights later, they were scaling up the crook of a towering skyscraper. Those childlike eyes of theirs had reappeared, bright and beaming through the foggy haze of the shattered city.

They raced each other. Bounced across metal beams, pranced through the gorgeous light of the moon. Snapping their upgraded gear back and forth and twirling around lamp posts and machines, laughing stupidly at nothing.

Missing pieces of childhood they had lost to war, happiness that took long to be fulfilled had finally caught up to them. Only now, they were no longer kids - rather, adults giggling like teenagers in the middle of a dilapidated city.

It didn’t take long for the duo to reach the top. And soon, they tumbled to a heap on the roof, clutching their stomachs and chuckling breathlessly. 

_ ‘Is this freedom? Is this what it’s like to be free?’ _They both pondered.

Joy was such a foreign feeling to them still, even after experiencing it before. When they juked bullets in battle, rescued each other from death, and won a fight against the odds -- but it never felt so rewarding.

Because whether they won or survived or not, there would always be more.

It never felt like breathing the fresh air during a starry night, sipping at homemade alcohol, or Armin slipping in lapping waves and face-planting into the salty ocean water, or even when they sailed in open water and Mikasa skewered her first shark.

That joy felt different, special, rewarding. Nothing like they had experienced before. They only wished their old friends were there to enjoy it with them.

As Armin and Mikasa laid there, on their backs, gazing up at the stars and struggling to point out constellations -- Mikasa caught sight of lights on the far side of the city. Smoke from flame fueling up in the sky. Signs of humanity, survivors.

She fought past a lump in her throat, recalling the last time she had seen lights like that, all those years ago. She knew Armin didn’t notice it, so she didn’t say anything.

Instead, she waited. Waited until they were walking near a ravine next to a rushing river. Idly kicking stones and plucking green leaves from trees.

“You were right,” She began hesitantly, “About there being survivors. I saw the lights and buildings earlier.” Her boot flexed and struck another stone, “I guess I didn’t want to believe it until I saw it.”

Armin nodded, tugging a bit at the fabric of his shirt, “I didn’t want to either. But…” He almost faltered, “What had to be done was done, at least. We’re free, just like Eren wanted.”

Mikasa found her thoughts wandering back to cold depths at the mention of ‘freedom.’ She eyed Armin wearily, tracking his pale skin and hair for any traces of what she feared would come. Thankfully, there were none.

“Yeah.” She replied. The gush of bursting water became clearer the farther they dwelled down the path. Their boots crunching into hard sod was drowned out, until they spun a corner and discovered the brilliant sparkling phenomenon that caused it.

The water from a river above spewed over a ridge and soaked into the riverbank below. It was seemingly never ending. Each bob and splash of water surging into crystal blue like a spoon beating cake batter.

It was far more beautiful than any gritty lines of a history book would ever let them imagine.

Their fingers, much like their childhood ones, reached out experimentally towards the shimmering turquoise. Hands knobbed by war with creases that were ever so slightly receding. Being rinsed clean with that natural liquid essence, as if it rubbed all the sins from their skin.

They felt the ice cold water seeping through the gaps, smoothing over their scars and muscles. It never remained in one place. Mindlessly, they related it to their vain attempts to save their comrades, commanders, friends…

How they always slipped away no matter how hard they tried.

Armin stepped up the stairs of a cluster of rocks, letting the water hit him like a cold shower. Paying no mind to how the liquid bled through his grey shirt and plastered wet hair over his eyes.

Mikasa followed suit a few rocks beside him. She swept her hair from its ponytail, which splayed over her shoulders. Her black raven locks were slightly grown out then, nipping at her collarbone and dripping with droplets of diamond white.

A dreadful question broke through her mind, and her lips parted, but shut again with unsurity. She didn’t want to ruin the moment, pondered whether or not she should wait again.

Mikasa listened to the pitter-patter of water slopping across rocks. It reminded her of when she watched rain drops rinse down her window on a rainy day.

Sprinkles of water plopped into Armin’s hair and trickled down his face in lazy streams. He had closed his eyes, relishing the feeling.

Imagining being back in Shiganshina. In a plump, oversized beige coat as rain poured from the roof of a building. Wandering alone in an alleyway near his home. Using thin, small, pale hands to scoop up cups of water. Rain splattering onto his head with heavy drops.

Armin let out a breath through his nose and slowly opened his eyes. He caught Mikasa’s contemplative appearance from the corner of his vision. He pulled himself from the gushing shower, frowning, “What’s wrong?”

Mikasa shifted a bit on her feet, eyeing the gorgeous wonderland they discovered with a look that soured the awe she once had. 

“I--I’ve been thinking,” She spoke reluctantly. Armin frowned at her tone, but looked at her attentively. “There… There’s only a few years left, and it doesn’t seem like long enough. Not long enough for me to decide…” Her voice wavered like the faint thrum of an antenna. “...what to do, after you’re gone.”

As much as Armin wanted to pretend she hadn't said anything, he knew the words were bound to come eventually.

"I… I know." He nearly stuttered, "I've been… uh, thinking about it a lot, too."

Dousing water reverberated through the walls, the only noise other than the harsh silence that was only building by the second.

"Honestly, I…" Mikasa began again, "I'm terrified. Five years is… not long, Armin. It's not even a quarter of your life. I don't know what to do when it ends. Thought I could ask you while we still have time."

Armin sunk down carefully and swept away droplets that stuck to his eyelashes. He rested his hands on his soggy jeans before giving his response.

"It's your choice. You can either go back and rebuild Hizuru for your foretold destiny, or stay with the Eldians to make sure people do what's according to plan."

The man's fingers intertwined above his lap and his voice faltered. Knowing he was telling he was telling his closest friend what to do after he died. He just prayed she wouldn't ask him how to cope with his absence. 

"I know I’m probably going to retire a year or so before it happens. If that’s how it has to be, I don’t want you to get involved. It’s not your responsibility.”

“Eren was never meant to be your responsibility either.” Mikasa snapped, “Yet still, we went out of our way to assist him, avenge him, and do everything he asked. Like those letters he sent us when he invaded Marley. Even after he abandoned us for months, we still answered. We still had faith in him, and…”

The female shook her head, realizing that she had lost her train of thought, “He was so unstable in the end. Everything he put himself through caused him to be that way. I don’t want you to end up the same.” The female caught a dribble of water on her brow and wrinkled her nose.

“We don’t know what will happen. No one that I’ve heard of has ever tried to to die out with the curse. It’s… frightening to me. Isn’t it for you?”

Armin’s stone-cold eyes reflected the suave river waves lapping below him. Pummeling the shore with slurps of uneven swirls.

Something about the way Mikasa spoke her fears reminded him of Eren. The same way he staled their awe of the ocean by reminding them that there was still a war to be won. Blood to be spilled. Innocents to be killed. 

Judging by Mikasa’s teetering expression, she knew it, too. 

“Yes, of course it is.” Armin answered, peering distantly into the crook of the horizon. Past the burnt, ragged crags of mountains that surrounded the paradise, and into the clefts of clouds by the sun. 

He didn’t know why he did. And he almost got lost dipping through the sudden swarm of memories in his skull. Eren's were still the loudest. His pained, yet determined voice bleeding into him, reminding him what he needed to do next. Had to--no, _ needed _to… Armin stilled, eyes wandering back to Mikasa.

She seemed to notice him recollecting himself.

He needed to wait.

“...But as terrifying as it is," The blond declared, "we can only wait and see what happens. Enjoy the time we have left, make the most out of it. There’s nothing else we can do.” 

He felt thoughts prick at him involuntarily. Sorting through each one was sickening. Like prodding through stolen wares, trying to find a needle in a haystack. 

“Yeah.” Mikasa said, and decided to drink in the scenery with him, “That’s better than wasting time worrying about it, anyways.”

Her memories became a blur after that.

All that she could remember was them shucking off their boots, diving into fresh blue, watching the river tumble and the sky roll into a deep indigo.

The adventures sent seasons wafting by like minutes. They both tended to lose track of time, only realizing it passed when leaves began to churn gold on trees and shriveled up dead at their feet. 

The cool chill that infiltrated the thin cloth of their shirts caused them to shiver and curl up in loads of blankets in the camp they shared. 

That was how they spent their days on the bridge of winter. While they spent many summers dipping their heads under cool waves, they watched the fluids freeze in place in the winter. Slick ice coated the surface of the river, and stung the tips of their fingers when they touched it. 

The days their breath came out in puffs of white and they rubbed away the goosebumps on their arms.

Snow scattered over the dirt that once harbored grass, suffocating the vegetation underneath. But nothing compared to the whirlpool and blades of ice that was once a beautiful waterfall. Every strand was sculpted with perfection. Each shard piercing sharply from the cliffs edge like an explosion frozen in time.

Dreadfully, it reminded them of what they had grown from. Each crisp, protruding icicle reminded them of the jaws of long gone titans. The ones that were slaughtered in the battle of the rumbling. Their commanders, their people. The people they failed to save.

Every now and then, Mikasa would remember what brought her and Armin there. The inevitable.

Through those years of endless laughter, of bounding down the shoreline of secluded beaches, watching flocks of birds soar over their heads. Sprinkles of bird seed to beckon them closer, even as the day that would tear them apart grew nearer.

Of Mikasa's own rosey lips, ready and begging to tell everyone of what they had seen -- before Armin hushed her, telling her that they should keep it a secret. Let the people experience the wonders for themselves. Maybe even write a book about it one day.

To which, she agreed.

Mikasa began to notice how much more Armin smiled around her throughout the years. The creases of his lips perking in a way she'd never seen before.

As the stubborn baby fat on his cheeks slowly withered away. As did Mikasa's own. Their gazes and bodies became firmer, hardened by past strains of war. 

While each day flittered by with each tender sip of tea and coffee from their glasses. 

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner. 

Summer, Fall, Winter, and Spring. 

Again, again, again and again. 

Until they were sitting at the table in their bunker once more.

Mikasa clinked her spoon through the thick broth of her soup. Armin thumbed bleakly at the thin tablecloth, taking delicate nibbles at the sweet potato pie they both battered in order to celebrate. 

Five years flew by far too fast. And so did the day they dreaded would come. 

November 3rd. Armin's 28th birthday.

Sunlight blared weakly from the blinds that were cracked ever so slightly. Silence squeezed heavy in their throats. The pops and sputters of bubbling hot chocolate was all that could be heard.

Until Armin snapped off the stove and poured the milky beverage into two separate cups. After taking a swig and relishing the sweet taste, he decided to speak.

"I can still remember the day it happened." 

It came out in a dry mumble, but Mikasa still heard it, nonetheless. Armin saw her shift in her seat a moment, cross one leg over the other, but she said nothing.

"I was hoping that…" Armin resumed vaguely, tending to a dirty dish to busy his hands, "Maybe that," He scrubbed a bit at it with a sponge, "That I would still have some time before then. Maybe even after."

He glanced again at Mikasa, his expression sour, "...What do you think?"

The woman offered a simple hum, twiddling her silverware between her fingers. "Maybe." She replied, "Hopefully. I was thinking that, maybe, the titan shifters would have something to do with it. Extend time, if that’s even possible." Her hands fell slack, "I don't know."

Armin clacked her drink beside her, sidling back into his own seat and clearing his throat. 

"Me too."

The days grew long and threatening after that. Not that they were any different than usual. They still explored any trace of untarnished acres they could find.

There was always more to explore, and by that time, more people began to experience the wonders as well. They even wrote books about it, just like Armin said they would.

Everything was normal. Or, at least, it seemed normal. Truthfully, Mikasa tried to forget about what would happen, chose to glance over warning signs -- ones that she once tracked fearfully for in bouts of paranoia.

Even as the day Armin warned her about came over them.

But even it fluttered past, just like all the others. 

Months melted by like fresh butter sizzling in a pan. White snow soaking into stone roads, lumber molting into ash under the heat of flame, sparks popping free.

Shivering, drained bodies collapsing into thick bed sheets after long, tiring days.

Every night Mikasa would appear at the door of Armin’s room, and sometimes, they would spend the night. 

Discuss faded memories, regrets, embarrassments, back when their world was a simpler one. Feelings occasionally slipped in, with concerns and frets of the future. Even teases of what they used to do in the past. Drowsy, fond, and nostalgic conversations resonated through the room, and oozed from the walls of their home. 

It rattled the worries they once had, distracted them of any fears of what was to come. 

Soon, Armin began to appear at Mikasa’s door instead. She began to find comfort in the exhausted sighs he huffed after his long and restless days, the cute snorts that slipped out when he chuckled.

After his next birthday struck, there was heavy, impossible relief that somehow, he was still there. A soft, stable presence in the wreck that was once both of their lives. Knitting them back together. 

Thread by thread. String by string.

Neither of them would be there forever, Mikasa knew. But the weight of there being only a fixed amount of time left was haunting. 

Each meager second ticking by could be his last. One last breath and then no more. And that thought alone was something that could keep her awake all night if she let it.

There was still space between them, however. A barrier that, admittedly sometimes, Mikasa was tempted to cross. Armin was the last person left that she truly trusted, and yet, she felt that the barrier was necessary. That it would be wrong to test their boundaries and pursue such a foreign thing with a childhood friend. Especially when it was unknown of how long it would last.

It was one of those thought-blanched, restless nights when Mikasa noticed the first few streaks of grey in Armin’s hair. They were difficult to spot, practically invisible, in fact, but she could still see them.

The first signs. 

She wanted to believe that she was just being paranoid again, that they weren’t there. But everytime her eyes adjusted to the darkness and onto the slight tinge of light glazing those flaxen strands -- they were still there.

It was happening a year after she expected it to, and yet she still felt that it was happening too soon. 

She wasn’t able to sleep that night.

A few days later, when they were sidling through what seemed to be abandoned mines. It was nearing twilight outside when Mikasa insisted to enter. 

Anything to keep her mind from spurring at the thought of what he would look like in a few months, weeks, days -- minutes. Because, fuck, she couldn't believe it was happening.

She had seen faint hazes of light through the oaks, but overlooked them as stars in the sky. The stars had gotten so much brighter as the years passed.

A stupid mistake. She had tested their luck.

They didn't realize it as their eyes crawled the thick cave walls. The crackling flame of their torches revealing splatters of paintings on dry stone. 

They appeared strangely bright, bold, unblemished, some were even still damp and marred streaks on the palms of their hands.

Blots of fiery red, juicy orange, cobalt blue, bold green. Of faces, buildings, machines they've never seen before.

They were so distracted by them that they failed to see the jaws of cruel silver, only heard the sharp _ crack _as it snapped into Armin's leg.

He cried out, a garbled, mindless shout, and crumbled to his knees. Hisses and seethes of curses grit through his teeth.

The noise ricocheted deeper down the cave, alerting dark humanoid figures that were camping a few yards away. Although, the duo hadn't realized they were there. 

"Vem där?!" Came a distressed call with a strange accent. 

Both of the Eldians' faces blanched white. On instinct, Mikasa snatched her friend by his arms and shot to her feet.

Her whispers of swear words mingled with his, however quieter. She gave enough courage to reel against the wall and bolt back in the direction they came.

"Wh-What are you doing-?" Armin gasped, pained and forced. It tore through Mikasa's terrified memories of gunshots and furious barks from their enemies.

"We can't--not--not now." She babbled, "We're not ready. Not like this. Who knows what they'll do."

She didn't trust them. Didn't want to, feared that they would break it. One wrong or mistranslated word or action could be their end.

The viced weapon, a bear trap, as far as they could tell, popped free after several desperate yanks and tugs. Armin's leg very nearly came off with it. And despite his weak splutters of, "I'm fine--I'm fine," His chest heaved and body trembled with each breath.

Armin's fingers grasped weakly at Mikasa's own, he pointed at the people they had alarmed.

They stood heavy on their feet, with sturdy boots, thick furs, and buckles. Men with rough muscle and beards and lofty women with shovels and saws in their hands.

They looked almost prehistoric. Harsh, foreign words tumbled off clumsy tongues. Many of which must have been, "Who were they?" and, "Where did they go?"

_ "Vikings?" _Mikasa guessed bleakly, befuddled to how the Earth felt like it shifted in time.

"No," Armin carefully corrected her, "...Survivors."

Seeing lights buzz and flicker in the distance was nothing like witnessing the effects Eren caused face to face.

He had crippled their economies so badly that they spiraled back in time. 

The Eldians may have had freedom, but these people didn't. It had been robbed from them. An eye for an eye.

Mikasa glanced down to notice that Armin's calf was still healing. Spouting pathetic wisps and chokes of steam, whilst days before, it would've taken mere seconds to meld back together. He had suffered far worse injuries, taken advantage of his powers many times. 

Now, it was clear that his powers were fading. And soon, would be an empty husk of what it once was.

Nothing but a shell, just like the one Armin lost to the unforgiving depths of the sea. 

Mikasa stilled herself and took a deep, barely-reassuring breath. Bathed in the last reassurance she had. That there was still time left.

Days later, when they were huddled on a rug in front of a hearth melting fireplace -- Armin's leg still hadn't healed.

The bone of his calf was split in two, held together by several bandages and binds. He began to use a cane to walk, which made his sudden loss of coordination all the more daunting.

The clatter of glass shattering to the floor after it slipped out of the blond's fingers. The low, careful, "Sorry," that he mumbled every time it did.

The warmth left his skin quicker and the white stripes of hair kept growing thicker, until no traces of youthful blond were left.

The hisses of pain and silent bites of his tongue became parched coughs that cracked his throat.

Crows feet sketched lines on the creases of his eyes, before dips in his cheeks and between his brow grew broader.

Mikasa could only feel the sink and twist of anguish in her gut every time a new sign appeared.

She could only stand to wavering feet and help him. It was all she could do.

It had happened over the span of seven days. A week. Far too fast for either of them to comprehend.

Both of their pens sprawling their signatures on retirement documents came fast as well. 

And nearly a decade after they vacated from it, they found themselves hobbling back onto Marleyan soil. Settling into a small apartment on the south side of the reconstructing town. 

Mikasa didn’t tell anyone who they were, or what was wrong. Armin didn’t want her to. Didn’t want anyone to see him like this. Wanted to have peace as long as he could before it passed.

It didn’t take long until Armin could no longer hide his fears of what would happen. His disguise cracked away, like glass shards breaking and scattering across hard tile floor. Leaving him with scared icy eyes and a strange sunken, yet youthful face. It seemed almost cryptic, unnatural. Something that sent chills crawling up Mikasa’s spine.

She didn’t think it could get any worse. Couldn’t imagine his condition getting any worse. But that was before more time passed, when Mikasa noticed him leaning on his stick heavier than usual. Dark circles under his eyes and wrist quivering as it hovered over another book he was writing. 

“Is something wrong?” Mikasa offered, it was all she could manage. Armin’s head rose up a bit, his lips parted and Mikasa could already hear the sickly, airy gasps that left them.

“I… It’s…” He shut his eyes, shaking his head slightly. Even his own voice was becoming frail and weak. “I’m sorry.” The faint cord of his throat cracked, “I’m sorry, I… I didn’t want you to be the one to … deal with this…”

It seemed like he was apologizing for something far greater than what he was intending. 

“It’s not your fault.” Mikasa insisted, Armin only ended up shaking his head again. 

His next words came out more hesitant, “I… wish I could… tell you."

“Tell me what?” The dark haired female replied, “Why can’t you tell me? What’s stopping you…?”

A soft sigh left her friend, followed by the next set of wavering breaths. "Back when you first told me what you thought… about the memories, you were right. There's more you don't know that… that you should."

Armin trailed off, gazing at a scratch on the wooden table, he mindlessly traced it over with a finger. 

When Mikasa asked him again, he didn't respond.

"It's not going to get any easier," He once had warned her. She heard him mumble it again, hours before his knees gave out in the hallway, she caught him in her arms as the crack of bones snapping pierced her ears.

His still recovering leg had snapped in two again, twisted the wrong way because of thinning bones.

It was only then did Armin cry out, shrill and agonized. Feeling the pain of his actions catching up with him.

It shook him, forced him to recall Eren's final memories, where he felt the same pain. So did Falco. Reiner. Pieck. Annie.

Armin was unable to think past all the memories caving in on him. Suffocating him. Bombarding him with far too many scenes than he could process or handle, all at once. Thought maybe he blacked out, passed out from it all. 

He awoke back in bed, gazing in a thick and tattered haze at the ceiling. 

He thought maybe it was a dream. Considered if everything was a dream. But the binds winding up his calf and pulses of pain told him otherwise.

Some part of Armin felt like he deserved it. To be stuck in bed for hours on end, twisting and curling in, sweating, forgetting -- with Mikasa as his lone company. She could only watch him suffer and offer soothing words. It was all she could do.

Armin knew he would be stuck like this for a few more weeks, a few more days, even. 

He saw it in the memories. He forgot which one. Couldn't keep track, couldn't individualize them anymore. But he had seen it. Fuzzy, yet clear.

There was still one last thing he needed to do before his time stopped short. It was something he dreaded into the pits of his soul, a thing he knew he couldn't bear the thought of, somehow far worse than anything else. 

But it was mandatory. Like slicing off flayed ends of string. Shucking off heavy chains. Letting go. It was something he had pondered off for nine years now. 

He needed to let go.

Back when he returned to Paradis with Mikasa after their hands were bloodied in Marley -- he thought that it was over.

Or rather, pretended that it was. Until he fell asleep again, and remembered.

It was only when he slept did he see distant, blurry dreams of Eren. Maybe they were memories Armin had forgotten, hauntings, memories Eren wiped clean, spectres, maybe just dreams.

Encouraging whispers in Armin's ear. "There will be no outbreaks of mutiny or unnecessary deaths." He said, as promises of the future danced in Armin's mind. Premonitions.

"Don't worry, one day, someone will remember again. Just like we did. The cycle will be complete." 

As all of the memories wilted away, his own included. Sucked of life like the dead leaves that crunched at his feet during fall. 

Even as they died, disappeared, that one thought remained to haunt him.

He wasn't finished. It wasn't over.

Still, Mikasa refused to leave Armin's side. She watched the steady rise and fall of his chest as he slept. Soft, barely-audible snores, and fingers nipping at the fabric of his pillow.

Her tears had long since dried. So many were spent fretting on what would happen, that by the time it came, there were none left to shed.

She smoothed her fingers over his knuckles. Silently mourning each silk-smooth part of them he had lost. Which were now marred and rough like sandpaper. 

It was almost incomprehensible that he was once the same boy she witnessed the waterfall with. Dwelled into all those haggard landscapes in order to see a long forgotten paradise. 

Those moments seemed so far away now, distant. Like decades had passed in the span of a few years. Her thumb pressed hard into his knuckles at the memories, and Armin’s eyes fluttered open, foggy and uncertain.

“Hey,” She found herself saying, unsure of what else she could. 

His pupils drifted across her features, then behind her in a confused manner. She expected him to clear his throat, struggling to relieve his hoarse voice of the side effects of the curse, but to no avail.

Anticipated a murmur, or slurred, “What happened?”

But nothing could prepare her for the true words that slipped off his dazed lips.

“Who are you?”

All sense of Mikasa’s reality shattered in that instant. She thought maybe it was a joke, a cruel one, but a joke, nonetheless. But deep down, she knew Armin was never a jokester. Not even when she slipped off an embankment of a pond years ago, and he laughed. He apologized, and helped her back up, only to be shoved into the water as well.

Now, however, Armin didn’t apologize. Stared at Mikasa blankly, as if under the gaze of a stranger. And he asked her again, “Who are you?” As if to remind her that he even said it in the first place.

Mikasa’s voice refused to work, croaking as she forced the words from her lungs, “A-Armin, it’s me.”

He couldn't have forgotten. It was… it was impossible, right? The female's thoughts threatened to marsh into turmoil.

"Don't you remember me? We're Eldians, soldiers, right? Survey Corps, officers. We retired last month together. Please, just…" Her voice quickly contorted, quivering. She couldn't think of what else to say.

Armin squinted at her, scratching a cheek. His eyes skimmed the room further, clearly struggling to put the pieces together.

He still looked on the brink of slumber, and Mikasa feared if he fell asleep again, he would forget everything. She felt like it was her last chance.

"Do you remember anything? Anyone?" She insisted, "Connie and Jean?" … "Sasha? Pixis?" … "Hange? Levi? Erwin? Eren??"

Her chest felt as if it would burst.

"...Eren?" A look of recognition fluttered across Armin's face. 

Mikasa nearly melted in relief, but then grew concerned. "...Why is he the only one you can remember?"

The white-haired blond visibly frowned and bit his lip. His fingers fiddling with the sheets suddenly appeared restless. His eyes gained spirit and anxiousness to them. 

"I… I don't have much time." He muttered, and sat up, trying to recollect himself. 

Mikasa faltered, before she forced her brows to stern, "How do you know?" She decided to confront him while she had the chance.

"I know you've been hiding something. Ever since the memorial. You've always been terrible at hiding things, keeping secrets -- at least, in my eyes. I've been waiting for you to tell me, but you keep avoiding it, keep acting like I don't notice." 

She paused again, briefly feeling a haze of deja vu, "Please, I just want you to tell me before you--" She breathed, biting back a pang of sorrow, "Before you can't."

Armin fell silent, rubbing a spot between his eyebrows while he sorted through mingling scenes in his brain. He shut his eyes.

_ Mikasa. _ He told himself. _ Her name is Mikasa. _

Armin squeezed back against her grip. 

"I know… I know that you've noticed."

He hesitated, thinking over his actions, "...I've already done it to everyone else. I… I didn't want to do it to you. Not-Not everything. Eren--he... didn't want to either." Armin winced.

"Done _ what?" _Mikasa implored.

The hand intertwined with hers clenched tighter.

"Erased people, erased memories. Their pasts, their pride of being Eldian, _ everything. _It was the only way to get everyone to cross safely, I almost did it to you, too. But I couldn't." 

He clenched his teeth, "I couldn't. And now, it's all coming back to me…"

_ The founding titan. _Mikasa realized, remembering books that once concealed the history of their pasts. How its power could be misused in order to keep peace between citizens and their government.

_ Historia. _A subject of royal blood. One that would be easy to lure into place. Especially if it were an invitation to a ceremony that honored her deceased comrades.

Armin's eyes flickering as they made contact with her. It was on purpose. How even Mikasa’s own memory wavered from the magical effects.

Mikasa tried to tug her hand away from him, but it wouldn't budge.

"You've done the same thing as King Fritz! How could you-? To everyone? Even your own commanders!" 

The female remembered how Levi and Hange laughed at her for mentioning something about the surrounding countries not trusting them. Come to think of it, she couldn't remember much of that either.

"I thought you were trying to end the cycle, not repeat it!"

"It…” Armin paused, recognizing his own words, “...It had to be done." 

He looked at her regretfully, with eyes full of shame. "Just like what we have to do next."

Mikasa's teeth involuntarily clenched as she felt the pulse in Armin's hand begin to strain, thrumming in uncoordinated thumps. 

Somehow, she understood what those words meant. Felt the weight to them.

"One day, someone will remember it again, just like we did." Armin claimed wearily, "That's what Eren told me, and he was right. But that person can't be you. It will be the next inheritor of the nine titans. One day, you'll meet her."

"I thought you said the curse would die out with you." Mikasa tried, breaking her silence. 

"It's like I said, it's impossible to destroy all of humanity, just like it's impossible to end the curse. We have to let it die out on its own."

The swell of conflicting emotions in Mikasa's chest was almost unbearable. She still felt the wavering heartbeat from the wrinkled hand she was holding, but now, she realized that she didn't want to let go.

A chuckle of disbelief left her, in bitter irony of the situation, "As much crazy shit that we've done, and all that you've put us through, I…" She shook her head, suppressing her fears, "I'm going to miss you. I-I don't want to say goodbye."

Armin shut his eyes again, sucking in faint breaths. Ones that felt like breaths through a thin straw. Final ones.

"It's alright." 

He reached out a hand through the darkness, until he saw the blast of contrasting colors. Blue, white, black -- and his fingers clasped the small hand of a little girl.

Back in reality, he huffed out a sigh and offered his friend one last smile, however strained.

"You won't have to."

Just as Mikasa caught on to his words, his pupils flashed purple behind their lids. 

Armin couldn't bear to crack his eyes, knowing what he would see if he did. He mustered two more feeble words, in both relief and mortification of his actions.

"I'm sorry."

  
  


###

  
  


It had been a few months since the funeral passed.

That day felt strange, deja vu, maybe. The days before then were a blur, filled with memories of war, expeditions, exploration, wonders, sights Mikasa would never forget.

She didn't recognize the man that was buried. Didn't know who he was. Only recalled standing by his casket, trying to remember why she came to the funeral in the first place.

To pay respects, she decided. A dedicated soldier, like herself, lost to battle. Or, so they said.

Before long, she found herself sitting by his gravestone. 

The fresh carving of the name 'Arlert' and mold-encrusted 'Jaeger' caught her eyes. Neither of the names meant anything to her, but something at the thought stirred strange in her gut.

Mikasa's gaze slithered across the last verse of the book of her lap. She had found it on her bed a few weeks before. Layered with dust and signed in a fine cursive that she could barely understand. 

It was a very long story. Curved with many twists and turns, betrayals and friendships, with no true antagonists.

Just conflicts upon conflicts and problems upon problems.

It was built around a story far too similar to her own to not at least be inspired by it. 

So tragic and bitter, with no sweetness at the end. Like tea that became sour after sitting in the kitchen for too long.

The Marleyan brushed a few fingers in the soft grass, ogling back at the two lone graves again.

  
  


She wished the story ended differently.


End file.
